Latest From
Thought Catalog
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Things I Feel When I Miss You: An Open Letter To My Friends
I remember when we met. We were 6 years old and climbing trees; we were 13 years old and discovering boys; we were 18 years old and starting university, we…
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How To Define Your Ambiguous Relationship
Worry that your relationship lacks definition because you are vastly over-invested (you are) (this is the most clarity and insight you will have throughout this whole situation). Spend more time…
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Why Birthdays Are So Depressing
Am I seriously having a Sixteen Candles moment? Thank God I don’t care about my birthday because I would be really bummed right now if I did. I’m so happy…
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The 5 Stages Of Moving In With Your Boyfriend
Why on earth does one person own four different toothbrushes, all of which need to be replaced? Why are there quarters and dimes and nickels and pennies on the floor,…
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In Defense Of Period Sex
And I know, guy, that you don’t get your period (although sometimes you’re as annoyingly moody as if you did), so let me lay it down for you in a…
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Things You Must Stop Doing Once You Turn 25
When I turn 25, I should stop being shocked by the fact that my peers are getting married. Proclaiming yourself husband and wife in your mid-twenties doesn’t completely read as…
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Brief Letters To My Mom
Why’d you leave me with your crazy sister when you went into labor? She let me drink orange juice and milk at the same time and I threw up everywhere,…
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A List Of Things People Unintentionally Do When They’re Uncomfortable
Behavior: Avoiding eye contact. Likely to happen when: You’re talking to your crush. In confrontation. You’re talking to someone who intimidates you. You’re talking to someone you hate. Why? It’s…
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6 Things You Can Do While Waiting For Someone To Text You Back
Nothing pains me more than waiting for a VIP text message. Whether it’s a text from your ex, someone you’re planning on having sex with later, or your drug dealer…
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How To Keep Someone From Falling Out Of Love With You
Get into a drunken fight with them at a nightclub and scream “You know what you did!” just like Lauren and Heidi did on The Hills. Your lover won’t actually…
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Things I Wish Someone Had Told Me When I Turned 18 (Happy Birthday Little Brother)
This is for you, little brother, on your 18th birthday, and for all the other little brothers and sisters who are being asked by life to please leave childhood behind,…
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Understanding The Strange Dating Habits Of Twentysomethings
A new kind of relationship seems to have sprung from online dating and technology, which is The Two Week Relationship. It’s when you date someone from anywhere to two weeks…
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5 Lies Carrie Bradshaw Told Me
Perhaps the most unrealistic aspect of the show was Carrie’s lax work schedule. Homegirl only had to write one column a week in a crappy newspaper and still managed to…
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Questions I Have For Perfect-Looking Women
They’re my friends—I know what they think their problem areas are, I know what colors they think they don’t look good in, I know if wearing a 4-inch heel makes…
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10 Types Of People I Do Not Trust
The woman who wont drive 45 minutes to the only open McDonalds in her town at 5am when her stomach threatens to suicide over an unrequited love affair with a…
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The Second Time You Fall In Love With Someone
The second time you fall in love with someone, it’s going to feel different. The first time felt like a dream almost. You were untouched, untainted by anyone. You accepted…
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If I Could Tell You How I Really Feel
Would it be better, if I could tell you how I really feel? If the next time your eyes met mine in the half darkness of a moodily lit bar,…
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’90s Talk Show Hosts: Where Are They Now?
From Ricki Lake’s cringe worthy (but adorable!) street sass to Jenny Jones’ implant-obsessed panel of midwestern beauty pageant dropouts, I couldn’t get enough of Talk TV (much to my mothers’…
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5 Things You Can Do In A Public Restroom
I always hear people talking about how much they hate using public restrooms, but these people are obviously only using the facilities to empty their bladders/colons. Here are five other…
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I Am The Smart One, She’s Just My Sister
She’s got long blond hair and curves and when she walks into a room, men act like a literal bomb’s gone off. One time, our mom scolded me by asking,…
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Reasons Why I Cannot Love You
Don’t get me wrong—I think you’re great. I like to eat dinner across from you, quickly glancing down at the fork idly fondling my food when you catch my eye.…
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Can You Love A Monster?
My brother is messed up. Even though we’ve become “close” in the last few years, I still acknowledge that he’s a person with serious rage issues. I knew things weren’t…
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What His Underwear Says About Him
I’ve always had the mindset that if a guy wears really expensive or “sexy” underwear, he actually lacks confidence – he makes up for his insecurity by expensively framing the…
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Ten Reasons Why You Should Never Date Me
I’m a drive-by spooner. I get in, I get out, and I go to my corner of the bed ASAP. If you want something to hold on to all night,…
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Wear A Bathrobe Everyday Forever
I have recently cultivated an interest in bathrobe wearing. Sometimes people forget about the bathrobe, the creepy (probably depressed) uncle of the fashion world. They wake up, shower, and move…
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The Different Types Of Cigarette Smokers There Are
The Chainsmoker is equal parts gross and impressive. They’re that person who lights their next cigarette with the cherry of their last one. They’re the person you don’t even bother…
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Why Do Twentysomethings Always Feel So Old?
I think the reason why twentysomethings are so fixated on age is because we feel a pressure to be a certain way at 23, at 25, at 29. There are…
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What You Would Be Like In A Perfect World
In a perfect world, everyone you loved would love you back. It’d be as easy as 1, 2, 3. “Oh, you love me? I love you back then. No questions…
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Nine Reasons Why You Aren’t Getting Laid
You’re in a #dark place with your body. You feel fat and undesirable. You totally get why you aren’t getting laid! But that kind of thinking is dangerous. If you…
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The 5 Most Intimate Things You Could Do To Somebody
I recently held back someone’s hair while they vomited for the first time and was struck by how tender it felt. Scooping their hair up and pulling it back as…
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What Happens When Your Crush Doesn’t Crush You
You know the drill. You meet; you fall in ‘like’. Maybe you develop a romantic history (drunk sex, a date, a dance floor pash), or maybe you just admire them…
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The 5 Important Milestones In Every Relationship
In the beginning of every relationship, you essentially try to be the best version of yourself. You pretend you dress to the nines every single day (“Oh, this little number?…
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Why Gay Men Stay In The Closet
Sexuality is so personal. Conservative parents, fear of disownment and religion definitely play a role in someone ‘s decision to remain in the closet. But at the end of the…
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The Implications Of Telling Someone “If You Want To…”
These four little words, when left dangling at the end of a sentence like a cancerous limb, can result in a mental breakdown for the person on the receiving end…
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Different Types Of Quiet People There Are
The funny quiet person has a really quirky, surprisingly clever sense of humor and quick wit and as such is that much more endearing. In fact the funny quiet person…
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Judging Male Sexual Attractiveness Based On The Shoes They Wear
Men, the following is a guide for whether I would sleep with you, based on your shoes. Women, although I cannot presume you share my taste in men (and, apparently,…
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An Open Letter To The Person Pooping Quietly In The Public Bathroom Stall Next To Me
But really, I just want to say, go for it. Poop your heart out. Poop like there’s no tomorrow. Poop like nobody’s watching. I mean that. I don’t care if…
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The Immature Person's Guide To Sleep No More
Other than peeking at the website, I wanted to be completely in the dark when I got to the performance, and lo and behold, it was literally pitch black as…
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Ten Reasons Why Masturbating Can Be Better Than Sex
Your hand doesn’t talk back. It doesn’t bitch and complain or ask to be on top. It doesn’t text you at three in the morning asking you to come over.…
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The Joys Of Making Out
You should kiss someone if you like them. You’ll learn so much about them when you taste their spit. And it will also make you feel young again. No matter…
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On Bad Boys And Nice Guys
See, I’ve got a theory, and it’s that we’re all possessed by this need to be special, to be different – to matter so much to the person we choose…
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How I Feel About My Body
Not only were the external stimuli I was exposed to promoting an “ideal” body image, they were also promoting a sense that unless I fit that particular ideal, I should…
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The Different Types Of Third Wheels There Are
While they have common characteristics—a lone, often single humanoid in the company of a couple (and sometimes a really super cute, tiny little puppy the couple just added to the…
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The 5 Kinds Of People You Will Meet On Grindr
The Traveler just so happens to always be visiting that day and is in dire need of meeting up because he’s lonely or needs someone to show him the city,…
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4 Drunk Conversations I Need To Stop Initiating
Apparently there’s this part of my brain, lodged uncomfortably somewhere between the temporal lobe and the cerebellum, that drives me against my will to start aimless conversations while drunk. No…
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Huff Your Own Poop
Jenkem first came to public attention thanks to several news investigations into the living conditions of Zambian street children. They found that the children enjoyed in order from most popular…
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Things I Will Do If I Have A Crush On You
If I have a crush on you, I will ignore you. This is stupid and I hate it but it’s what I do. I will look at you and be…
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5 Telltale Signs That Your Relationship Sucks
So I know there’s a song called “Rollercoaster of Love” but to me, love is less of a Magic Mountain thrill ride and more of a sweet happy (and occasionally…
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How To Have Great Sex (A Guide For Straight Girls)
I’m not convinced first time sex needs to be this bad for women, or bad at all for that matter. All it takes is a ‘can do’ attitude, a little…
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To The One Who Broke Her Heart
Actually, forget that. Let’s not waste our time with meaningless pleasantries. Our acquaintanceship was as much out of necessity and courtesy as any could ever be. I loved her, and…