For financial reasons, especially in big cities, it’s so easy to move in together that you can’t even tell if you really want to or are ready to, you just…

Sometimes people can’t see what they have; they only see what’s missing.

4. Self-deprecating humor.

Yesterday Fielder asked his followers to text their significant others with “I haven’t been fully honest with you,” then wait one hour before texting them anything. Here’s what’s happened thus…

You brag about us to your girlfriends, you trawl our Facebook photos lustfully, you demand our attention through text and through increasing demands on our time.

We want to be loved, in a way that isn’t directly tied to how pure we are sexually or how much we’re willing to “give away.”

Posts that are cross-posted from your Twitter/Pinterest/Vine — if we wanted to see these things, we would be following you on these platforms.

Kiss him. Pull him towards you when the two of you are sitting in his car.

10. Your parents will call you from upstairs, downstairs, outside, etc., to hand them something that is literally 10 centimeters away from them.

3. He does not eat cats.

“I am only interested if you do it side by side,” I type.

Give me another dose, I say, and move determinedly towards him. He needs encouragement, I say, once I get there and find him desperately trying to shirk the flawless shell…

No one wants to talk to you anymore because every conversation has a 86.73% chance of you ending up in tears.

There are few things more depressing than seeing an entire generation of men who have perhaps one suit at best, and break it out only for weddings, funerals, and any…

4. Your Instagram and social network photo albums are littered with more pictures of your lunches and dinners than friends and family.

If you don’t “get” avocados, it’s time for you to be pushed off a cliff of some kind, because you are wasting valuable oxygen that the rest of us could…

I don’t want to love you anymore because I want to go to sleep.

Oftentimes, the demands of life require people to be good at stuff. But not everyone is good at stuff, so some people have to lie in order to keep pace.

Here is a list of 29 things from the 90s that you might not remember on your own.

You know someone is right for you if you break up with them and know that that’s never the end.

I don’t know about you but I’d rather breakdance barefoot on broken glass than be rejected by the only person I want and desire.

We search for true love and instead find false hope.

At the end of the fairy tale, when the Princess rides off into the sunset to marry the handsome Prince, you’re just like, “Really?? That’s IT??! I wanna see more…

Everyone, except for a white lesbian couple who had moved to the area to build parks for underprivileged children, was black or Hispanic.

5. You have polar opposite life goals.

There are constant comparisons being made.

I let my nose break me, but it turns out that, for the most part, I just wanted something to blame for my shortcomings.

I can’t tell you the last time I sat down to eat and didn’t completely fall into a whirlwind of frightening thoughts: Is this really three ounces of chicken? Will…

When I say I’m in love with you, I mean I love the story I can tell to my next lover, about my ex-lover, about how beautiful things were, how…

Though it comes as no surprise to nearly every woman on the planet that porn is not geared towards us whatsoever, it’s always nice to know that not just straight…

Hope is never gone, it’s just ignored.

Bonus points if you actually use different voices/accents for the different people in the imaginary conversation. That is a prestigious level of shower insanity.

6. The Usual Suspects

It is so much more simple to say, “Stop caring what a man thinks, ladies, you’re beautiful as you are,” than to address all of the myriad reasons why that…

Don’t kill anybody. There might be a time in your 20s when you encounter a situation where you’re like, man, I could totally get away with killing this person. Police…

But I am here to talk about realities, realities that are based on experiences, guy talks (who cares about that?) and late night chats with good female friends of mine.

Does your city have a giant pink elephant giving itself a bath?

2. You’re kind of avoiding introducing them to your friends.

16. Evidence also indicates that we may have had our first bisexual or lesbian first lady.

To be black and to vote Republican don’t seem to go together. But where does this distrust of black Republicanism come from? Are black people really slaves to the Democratic…

Soon, your honger — your hungry anger — will drive you to eat that Jumbo Slice and/or pack of nuggets as though it dishonored your family name and this is…

You have to start thinking she’s average.

Geeks are the bones of every high school. Not because they’re busy getting stuffed in lockers, but because they’re the only ones who aren’t pretending. Everyone else is pretending.

When I was a boy, if you were multiracial you learned pretty quickly there was no clearly designed spaced for you in the world.

Everyone convinced you that taking the first job that would have you was the best way to secure your future, and now you’re absolutely paranoid of letting it go.

Understand that it’s not easy to hear how someone you love very much is dissatisfied with you.

I’m not crazy, and this idea of us did exist outside of the dusty corners of my mind.

In 2009 I got really fed up with my 9-5 job and decided to quite and spend a year backpacking around Asia. It took a year of living with my…

6. If we don’t orgasm, it’s not to spite you.

13. You need to spend time apart, or you will get sick of each other.