“I think that we are like stars. Something happens to burst us open; but when we burst open and think we are dying; we’re actually turning into a supernova. And…

“Before I came over… a knowledgeable older friend of his had come by and told him, ‘Remember to vacuum the paneling too. Chicks really dig that.'” Is it true, ladies????

Call her after you kiss her–call her for no reason at all.

“…I have this history of wanting to work things out on my own and protect people from what’s going on with me.” – Kerry Washington

What’s something your boyfriend or girlfriend does that’s super duper cute?

You are still in that phase where you’re really into sex but you can only deal with so much post-coital spooning before you’re like, “Please leave, I want to watch…

“There’s no gravity between us our love is automatic… zoom, zoom, zoom make my heart go boom, boom, my supernova girl.” These words mean something to you because everything was…

It’s not until you go inside and are covered with the kind of sunburn that falls somewhere between “purple” and “my skin is sloughing off in sheets of pain,” that…

1. Yell “So, Who Else Heard that Hot Tubs Are a Breeding Ground For Infection?”

History in the making, right in front of your eyes– or rather, your ears.

“HAY WORLD, GUNNA TRY U. WHAT’S CON ED? LOL”

Makes the coy outspoken and the outgoing coy.

The universal feeling when going through a breakup, to use internet speak, is FML.

I married beneath me – all women do.

This routine of intense playing, without sleeping or eating or going to class lasted for three or four months. My close group of friends soon disappeared—I’d get the occasional text…

When you’re in your early 20s your love life seems to explode every 20 minutes or so. By the time you’ve reached your thirties, it is every five or ten…

A 16-year-old girl, slowly melting in the pitiless cauldron that is high school, suddenly wanting to kiss boys and date them instead of sticking your tongue out at them or…

Don’t entertain people who want to argue irrationally. Just don’t.

“My aunt never got married, and she is perfectly happy!”

I feel sexy and feminine all the time, even without makeup or a cool outfit. It’s the best accessory and goes with everything.

You can stand in the rain for an hour. You can keep standing in the rain. You can stand in the rain until you become the rain.

2. The average rate for a male porn star doing straight porn is $500 to $600. Gay porn will pay three times that amount.

What part of “You broke my heart” don’t you understand?

We haven’t seen each other in what will be 14 months. We are 5,000 miles apart. We haven’t spoken face-to-face in over a year.

And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that’s just fabulous.

All of your friends know to go to you for advice for sex, masturbation, porn, relationships, and generally delicate stuff that they wouldn’t be comfortable asking anyone else.

The problem of being me, I’m slowly starting to believe, is not a curse to be carried tiredly through life, or to be mollified by reckless pleasure-seeking (I’ve tried that).…

Strong Island is the only place to spend your summer vacation.

Do you ever go to sit down at a table and there’s complete and utter, bottomless silence.

5. Make time to cry.

When you are in love with love, you are in the relationship for its benefits, and you cower away from more difficult aspects.

You have those “silent dinners” you always feared.

2. You think of ways you will love them more than you think of the ways you hope they will love you.

8) Mold. I am deathly afraid of mold. If I open the refrigerator and take something out, or open up the bread and it’s covered in fungus, I will scream…

Realize how much you were happy to exaggerate or ignore because you wanted to keep the image you have of them in your head completely perfect.

Your thoughts will be reflected in behaviors, so try to limit the pessimistic ones.

30. When a song you loved in 1998 comes on the radio after you completely forgot it existed.

“That’s categories,” my sister explained, “choose a category and we all have to say something that belongs under the category you said. No repeats.”

I don’t even mind if my head smells like a dead raccoon by day six, I want to look perpetually Adele-chic and not have to sacrifice four hours of my…

[Sand dunes] bear a resemblance to the force that created them, wind. It is as if each grain of sand were a bit inside the memory of a natural computer.

During the two years we were together, he cheated on me with six girls I was well acquainted with.

“I love Thanksgiving turkey … it’s the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts.” – Arnold Schwarzenegger

“Don’t you know that [insert junk food here] is bad for you?”

Please don’t tell that I can’t remember why we’re fighting.

1. If They Add You On Facebook/Follow You On Twitter RIGHT After You Meet

Over time, Disney princes will mess you up worse than a bad speed habit.

3. They bail on things that are important to you.

Your real friends are the people who are there when it counts.

2) Describing yourself as “straight-acting.” What does that even mean?

The lyrics would be from the heart, and he’d tell me the truth: that I am difficult to love but that he loves me anyway.