Paul Rudd is made from the essences of 300 fresh, smiling puppies shoved in the skin-shell of an adorable dude.

One guy once sang “Lemme Buy You A Drank” in T-Pain’s voice and, I mean. I let him buy me one.

My father’s former tenant, whom he evicted for failure to pay rent for over a year, used him as a reference when applying at my place of work.

The people who made fun of their friends who got married younger (i.e. before 26) are often the people who are going to be lonely at age 30.

The last thing I can remember is being downstairs, and getting called into the living room once again for the dreaded lecture.

Going from light to heavy fish is the best way to eat sushi.

I’m going to share a game with you. This game will reveal incredible things about whoever plays it; surprise, shock and delight complete strangers, and has kickstarted more friendships than…

If a girl just walks up to you and says “Hey, can I buy you a drink?” it is totally sexy and guaranteed to work.

A somewhat frail and sickly child, Tesla was hovering above the precipice of premature death.

Nothing is worse than starting a movie and having the feeling that you’ve seen it a dozen times before. One of the biggest offenders in recycling similar ideas is romantic…

What little girl doesn’t want to wake up one morning and find out she’s inherited a royal title? (This is, I suppose, Disney’s equivalent to the Hogwarts letter.)

15. “Just Got Paid” Every time I cashed my minimum wage check from BlockBuster Video back in 2000, I would crank this song in my Geo Tracker to let everyone…

17. There was a Beatles-inspired cartoon series that ran from 1965 to 1969.

You don’t always know where your night may end up. But in those cases where you know you’ll be sleeping over, it’s best to make some preparations.

“I am going to eat a burrito the size of my head later!”

So where does traveling come in?

“If you want to flirt with me, give your server your number to give to me, don’t give it to me directly.”

The kind of man you marry wants to go down on you. The kind of boy you date wants you to go down on him.

The day before I left for college, I sat in the parking lot of a nearby beach with the windows of my Jeep rolled down, trying to mentally bottle the…

3. Please, don’t sing “Say My Name” or Spice Girls in a group of girls and just giggle drunkenly through the entire thing. Nobody likes you when you do this.

The first place I’d run to — if there was a zombie apocalypse — would be to a Costco and climbing up the metal scaffolding.

Positioning themselves in the light to look most like their flattering profile photo, as well as hoping against hope that their date will be as good-looking as promised, they can…