Thought Catalog

29 Differences Between Life In Your Early 20s Vs. Life In Your Late 20s

  • 0
Happy Endings
Happy Endings
You’ve aged like a fine wine that you hopefully paid more than $3 for…

1. Drinking alcohol

Early 20s: How much of this vodka from a plastic bottle can I drink before I puke?
Late 20s: How much of this wine can I drink before I involuntarily pass out at 10pm?

2. Wine

Early 20s: [in grocery store] Ok, where’s the cheapest bottle or box of wine that I can find? I’ll take that one.
Late 20s: [in grocery store] Ok, where’s a $20 bottle of wine that’s on sale for $15.99 that also has a nice label? I’ll take that one.

3. The definition of a “big night out”

Early 20s: RAGE! All-nighter, it’s 6am, let’s start daydrinking. I’ll sleep when I’m dead!
Late 20s: It’s midnight and I ate too much ravioli, I’ll sleep right fucking now actually.

4. Hangovers

Early 20s: Me and ten of my friends are hungover together, hair of the dog, brunch!
Late 20s: It’s just me, my headache, a delivery guy, and a Netflix marathon through half-closed eyes.

5. Other people’s opinions

Early 20s: I want you to like me!
Late 20s: Bitch I do what I want.

6. Eating vegetables

Early 20s: I bought the tomato, garlic, and onion Ragu.
Late 20s: How much kale, celery, romaine, chard, spinach and carrot can I fit into this smoothie without it tasting like it was literally blended from the dirt?

7. Eating junk food

Early 20s: Kraft mac & cheese, Doritos, McDonald’s… all in one day.
Late 20s: Kraft mac & cheese, bathroom, Doritos, bathroom, McDonald’s, bathroom, antacid, bathroom, bathroom, antacid.

8. Kale

Early 20s: ???????? Um, no thanks, I’m not a rabbit thank you very much.
Late 20s: In everything!!!!!!!!!!!!

9. The movies

Early 20s: Here, fill this Coke bottle with whiskey, sneak it in, then let’s makeout for a while!
Late 20s: Are you seriously trying to makeout with me right now? I’m watching a movie that I paid $15 to see!

10. Animated movies

Early 20s: Cartoons? Lame!
Late 20s: Let’s all go see the new Pixar movie at 7pm on a Friday night and cry at the end!

11. Dancing

Early 20s: Something I do with another person that is reminiscent to dry humping.
Late 20s: Something I do completely by myself in my underwear in my kitchen listening to music from the 90s.

12. Speed limits

Early 20s: Is there a cop around? No? Weeeeeee!
Late 20s: I’m going to go maximum 5 mph over the speed limit because I am a safe and responsible driver. If that kid behind me doesn’t stop tailgating me soon, I’m going to go under the speed limit so they learn their lesson about speeding. I’m delivering my own brand of vigilante justice. I’m Batman in a Prius!

13. Driving, in general

Early 20s: I think driving recklessly is fun!
Late 20s: Those damn youths make me terrified of being on the road.

14. Cleaning your apartment

Early 20s: Hahahah, clean? Me? Are my parents coming to visit? No? Then, put that vacuum away, sir!
Late 20s: If this apartment is not clean by every Monday morning, then I am going to lose my goddamn mind!

15. Hiking

Early 20s: Is someone going to have sex with me at the end of this hike? No? Ok, not going.
Late 20s: No, I cannot hang out Friday night, Janet, because my hike on Saturday morning is not going to hike itself!

16. Dating

Early 20s: OMG, does he/she like me baaaaaaack?! We hooked up, but I still don’t know!
Late 20s: We are either doing this thing or we’re not doing this thing, lemme know, I have shit to do.

17. The kitchen

Early 20s: A place that holds my microwave.
Late 20s: A place that holds the ingredients I will use to prepare meals with my own hands.

18. A clean kitchen

Early 20s: Ummmmm, yeah, I’ll just keep using dishes until I run out of clean dishes, then I will clean only one dish at a time as I need it, then when the sink is too full to even clean the one dish I need, I will relent and clean everything like I am on a coke high, except I won’t be, but it’ll feel like it.
Late 20s: My actual idea of torture would be if someone forced me to go to sleep before I was able to clean my kitchen.

19. Interior decorating

Early 20s: How much is that couch? Free off the street? Awesome, let’s get that one.
Late 20s: If my apartment does not look like an infusion of West Elm and Anthropologie, then someone is going to get cut.

20. Exercise

Early 20s: Meh, too much effort.
Late 20s: If I don’t exercise, I believe my muscles will actually atrophy. Also, everything fucking hurts.

21. Water

Early 20s: Something I drink to offset all the alcohol in my body.
Late 20s: Something I drink because my body is no longer working on autopilot and the struggle to survive is real.

22. Dishes

Early 20s: Paper plates unless it’s Top Ramen or cereal in which case I will use the one IKEA bowl I have in my entire apartment.
Late 20s: Fancy, casual, ones with black and white stripes, bowls of varying depth: which do you prefer?

23. Things to drink other things with

Early 20s: I’m still using the red plastic cups I bought in bulk for that beer pong championship.
Late 20s: I have red wine and white wine glasses, champagne flutes, juice carafes, coffee mugs, tea mugs, espresso cups. Basically, there is no drink you can throw my way that my cabinet does not have a proper container for. Come at me, beverages!

24. Organizing

Early 20s: Uhhhh, organizing? You mean like putting my papers into binders and shit?
Late 20s: OMFG, organizing shit GIVES ME LIFE! I may have actually gotten turned on the last time I was in The Container Store. Take me home, varying sizes of plastic containers that come with adhesive labels!

25. Farmer’s Markets

Early 20s: Whyyyyyy mom, are you dragging me to this at 8:30 in the morning?!
Late 20s: Hey hon, get the reusable bags, let’s get there before 8am to get the freshest peaches!

26. Date Night

Early 20s: This is a thing old people do, right?
Late 20s: The actual only way we’re going to keep this relationship from falling apart.

27. Sleeping

Early 20s: Five hours and I’m good to go, let’s party!
Late 20s: My entire day and possibly my week will be ruined if I do not get minimum 8 hours of REM cycle sleep.

28. Planners

Early 20s: Here’s where I put my loose suggestions of when I should go to class, even though we both know I won’t make it to most of these. Plus, who needs a planner? I live and die by spontaneity!
Late 20s: I literally forget all my plans unless I put them into a planner, which reminds me I need to get some fucking Gingko Biloba for my broken memory.

29. People who are 25

Early 20s: Oldddddddd.
Late 20s: TO BE YOUNG AGAIN! TC mark

Read our bestselling ebook How To Be A 20-Something here

HOW TO BE A 20 SOMETHING - HIGH RES (FINAL)

More from Thought Catalog

Thought Catalog Videos


    • http://flawedtwenties.wordpress.com Lyla Michaels

      Reblogged this on Conversations I Wish I Had and commented:
      LMAO!!!! SOooo True!

    • http://surlesyeuxverts.wordpress.com surlesyeuxverts

      Reblogged this on Sur Les Yeux Verts and commented:
      What can I say, it is true!

    • http://jaybirdblog.com/links-todaaaay/ Boys and Waffles and Some Wonderful Reads - Jaybird

      […] Proof that I am an old soul: I identified with all the “late 20s” things on this list even though, according to the list, I’m supposed to be a young wild child. […]

    • http://eatteachblog.com/2014/06/09/early-20s-vs-late-20s/ Early 20s vs. Late 20s - Eat Teach Blog

      […] inspired by this hilarious, but all-too-true post I read over the […]

    • http://understatedclassics.wordpress.com Clare

      Reblogged this on Understated Classics and commented:
      As I read and reflect, I guess you can say that your 20s are really life changing. Sad part is, I can totally relate to EVERYTHING that has been listed here. Laugh along, especially if you know what they mean! Happy Wednesday!

    • http://fyeahblog.com/fuck-work-read-this-4/ Fuck Work, Read This

      […] no longer a member of the 20-Something Club, I had to share Thought Catelog’s article “29 Differences Between Life In Your Early 20′s v. Life In Your Late 20′s” because it is eerily accurate.  Seriously, #1, #3, #4 and #29 are so me, and by […]

    • http://suzywongster.wordpress.com suzywongster

      Reblogged this on Suzywongsters rambling thoughts and commented:
      Hee hee :D I’m almost there…!

    • http://100tacks.com/2014/07/14/the-daily-8-071414/ The Daily 8 | 100 Tacks

      […] 5. Twenty-five things that confirm, though I try to deny it, that I’m in my late 20s. [Thought Catalogue] […]

    • https://thoughtcatalog.com/christopher-hudspeth/2014/07/10-things-you-dont-appreciate-your-parents-for-until-youre-an-adult/ 10 Things You Don’t Appreciate Your Parents For Until You’re An Adult | Thought Catalog

      […] Read this: 29 Differences Between Life In Your Early 20s Vs. Life In Your Late 20s Read this: 25 Things Every Woman Should Have By The Time She Turns 25 Read this: 25 Men Answer “What’s The Difference Between A Girl You Date And A Girl You Just Hook Up With?” Read this: 32 Game-Changing Quotes About Love And Life That Will Make You Feel Better, Instantly Read this: 27 People Confess To The “Fattest Thing” They’ve Ever Done Cataloged in […]

    • http://highteawithdragons.com/mondayitis-65/ Mondayitis | High Tea with Dragons

      […] Even though I’ve just turned 25 there are a lot of things I can relate to on this list of 29 differences between life in your early and late 20s – overall, I think they’re pretty […]

    • http://littletalksaboutlife.wordpress.com/2014/08/05/advice-lists/ 1. I hate advice lists | Life's Little Talks

      […] life changing pieces of advice for people in their 20’s,” to even reading about the differences we may find between life in our early 20’s and late 20’s. We’re obsessed with our […]

    • http://mysophisticatedignorance.wordpress.com/2014/08/18/when-youre-no-longer-in-your-younger-20s/ When You’re No Longer In Your Younger 20s… | My Sophisticated Ignorance

      […] Here’s the entire blog post article for your full reading pleasure. […]

    • http://districtsparkle.com/late-twenties-wish-list/ District Sparkle:late twenties wish list - District Sparkle

      […] into your pre-30 years, too? I found comfort & hilarity in articles like this, this, & have one more year to complete the […]

    • http://thebrassblossom.com/2014/09/28/weekend-love-it-quarter-century-life-happenings/ weekend love it — quarter century life happenings | the brass blossom

      […] This ‘Thought Catalog’ by Jamie Varon had me laughing out loud and fairly accurately sums up how I’m feeling about Early 20’s versus Late 20’s. A must read for a chuckle. […]

    • http://cutieslive.com/relationships-in-your-early-20s/ Relationships In Your Early 20s | Cuties Live

      […] 29 Differences Between Life In Your Early 20s Vs. Life In … – 29 Differences Between Life In Your Early 20s Vs. Life In Your Late 20s… […]

    • http://secretpregnanyblog.com/infertility-in-early-20s-vs-late/ Infertility In Early 20s Vs Late | Secret Pregnancy Blog

      […] 29 Differences Between Life In Your Early 20s Vs. Life In … – 29 Differences Between Life In Your Early 20s Vs. Life In Your Late 20s… […]

    • http://secretpregnanyblog.com/infertility-in-early-20s-dating/ Infertility In Early 20s Dating | Secret Pregnancy Blog

      […] 29 Differences Between Life In Your Early 20s Vs. Life In … – 29 Differences Between Life In Your Early 20s Vs. Life In Your Late 20s… […]

    • https://thoughtcatalog.com/gwendolyn-kansen/2015/04/28-things-ive-learned-by-28/ 28 Things I’ve Learned By 28 | Thought Catalog

      […] Change How You Look At Your 20s Read this: 14 Awesome Things About Life In Your Late Twenties Read this: 29 Differences Between Life In Your Early 20s Vs. Life In Your Late 20s Cataloged […]

    • http://obviweretheladies.com/2015/05/26/on-yolo-fomo-and-my-early-bedtime/ On #YOLO, #FOMO, And My Early Bedtime | "Obvi, We're The Ladies"

      […] whole #YOLO thing, or the dreaded #FOMO every time I stay in alone. When I see lists like this and this trending on social media, I can’t help but feel singled out because I don’t fit the mold they […]

    • http://markit.davelaphamblog.com/?p=205 weekly obsessions | part thirteen | Markit Photography

      […] that I’m 28 (gasp!) this blog post of your lower 20s vs. upper 20s made me laugh so stinking hard. Every single one (except for the clean kitchen, been doing that […]

    • http://personalitycafe.com/infj-forum-protectors/43648-infj-pictures-733.html#post23451746 Personality Cafe

      […] in my mind for the past 20 years ;D I found this early 20's vs. late 20's article online : 29 Differences Between Life In Your Early 20s Vs. Life In Your Late 20s | Thought Catalog and really felt old Xd already like the by 22 (well except the slow metabolism). I certainly hope […]

    blog comments powered by Disqus