In a world of hooking up, I want a date. I want to find a connection first. I want more.
Confront the challenges. Your worst-case scenario will likely not play out and you’ll feel proud of yourself in the end.
She’s the girl who feels broken and certain that everyone has noticed the parts she tries to keep hidden — the depression and anxiety that she’s fought since she was a child. She’s also the girl who has spent her life waiting for someone to notice that maybe — just maybe — she wants in.
I’m going to enjoy the only time I have to make changes and experience life — I’m going to be present. I’m going to fight against my naturally tendency to dwell and worry and I’m going to be here now.
Even though there are long, frustrating, tear-filled, lonely nights in the process of finding out what you want, there are also amazing moments along the way. The process is not quick and the self-doubt can be brutal but you’re doing exactly what you need to do.
I had hope that maybe things could get better in the next 6 months. For the first time in months, I felt hopeful about the future. I felt hopeful that there would even be a future.
My issue with lists is what the list seeks to do. It presents itself as a cheat, a life hack, and then leaves you with nothing.
Even though sitting alone with depression is lonely, it’s also temporary (as I have learned time and time again).
I’ve spent many nights out staring at the back of some guy’s head while he flirts with my friend. I’ve had to fend off the creepy middle-aged men who try to touch me and get too aggressive. I’ve been told what could make me prettier by more people than I care to give credit to and I’ve gotten my hopes up and been disappointed plenty — but, I’ve also tried.
I’m going to learn to sit with the silences, to be vulnerable. I’m not going to hide.