While the camp and cheese that was a Sex and the City (and Carrie) staple worked in the late 90s and early 2000s, it feels a little too optimistic and…

1. Lizzie McGuire

When you’re exhausted and just want to crash and not deal with anyone and you’ve got a big, fluffy, comfortable bed with fresh sheets and blankets all to yourself.

Love someone when they’re drunk and it looks like their face is melting and they’re stuffing food in their mouth, sauce dripping down the sides. Your body will recoil because…

Millions of people want to be in the NBA. But only 500 or so people each year have what it takes to be in the NBA. And you know what?…

Will you still be interested in all of the things I have to say, all of the coincidences we took as divine intervention last night when we were only so…

2. Like They’re Dead People And You’ve Only Got 5 Of The Senses.

Drinking is best done slowlllllyyyyyyy. Think of it as like a car and you’re the one behind the steering wheel. Now you have two choices: you can either drive yourself…

Here’s someone surprising his girlfriend with an improvised, egregiously off-key song expressing his deep and pure love for her.

A new song has hit the beloved YouTube by singer/songwriter duo, Garfunkel & Oates — and it’s about getting plowed in the bum to appease the tough rules of Christianity.

10. Go to a restaurant you’ve never actually been to and order something unique off of the menu. No cheeseburgers or salads, nothing you’ve had several times – and preferably…

Irreplaceable doesn’t quite mean necessary, but when someone finds you irreplaceable, that means you and you alone, offer them something that NOBODY else amongst the billions of other people in…

Even if they said they wanted to be beside me, I’d start to feel guilty and probably suspect they’re only there out of obligation — or not wanting to look…

Not every kiss begins with K — some start with tongue.

To say “I won’t date someone unless they are smart, kind, career-oriented, capable of compromise, and healthy” is far easier than to say “I won’t date someone until I am…

Sometimes you just want to punch the baby.

Do something nice for someone else — the kind of favor you might not see returned.

I remember watching this the first time around with many people romanticizing and squeeing over the Buffy and Spike relationship.

Whenever someone breaks up with you or one of your friends does something really cartoonishly terrible, your immediate consolation is that this is going to make for a great essay.

“We were drunk, and it was a mistake.”

Basically, if you’re the couple that just stands on the sidewalk for extended periods of time and boops noses together in between makeout sessions and sweet nothings, you deserve to…

I don’t know if you ever get better. I don’t know if a person can just wake up one day and decide to be an active participant in their life.…

Although I have had plenty of The Ones Who Will Be Different, I’ve had more of the first variety — the three bad dates guy.

You only interact for a brief period, but you’re totally kindred. This relationship occurs when you make a new friend on vacation or at a cousin’s wedding.

Kiss her lightly. Understand just how many boys have kissed her too hard, too fast, too sloppily.

You are the girl that every girl asks “OMG WHAT PRODUCT DO YOU USE” when you post selfies on your blog. You have got the perfect combination of length, well-conditioned…

After all, the only thing more aesthetically pleasing than a formless, wrinkled sack of flesh is a hairless, formless, wrinkled sack of flesh.

A person must mean a great deal to you if they’ve managed to become the focal point of your thoughts as you lay down to call it a night. That’s…

Maybe like Robert Johnson sang, you’re willing to sacrifice, to trade your soul or some freedoms or some other paths you could go down just to pick a side of…

Treat yourselves to a nice dinner out at a fancy place when one of you gets a Groupon for it. Order dishes made for two and laugh when the waiter…

Do I want to be one of those people who’s an “expert” on Marcel Proust and can wax nostalgic about trudging through all 4,211 pages of his greatest series?

If only you weren’t wearing gloves, then it would better because touching is better than most things.

I have had several sexual partners in my life, but I won’t tell you how many, because it doesn’t matter.

Everyone hates you and your stupid relationship. Everyone secretly makes fun of your constant back-and-forth of “love u baby” on your respective timelines. Everyone is going to quietly rejoice when…

You are closed off. So closed off and sometimes it feels good to be the only one who can disappoint you, doesn’t it? By never relinquishing your power, you are…

If someone suddenly and magically disappears into thin air right when you need them most, that person is fake.

The irony of the icebreaker is that I learned absolutely nothing about anyone, because I was too busy freaking the hell out.

It’s important that I never forget you, although I have a feeling that it’s not entirely up to me. Time dictates what gets remembered and what gets left behind. I’m…

They will fight you, kicking and screaming, and still not realize they are in trouble.

Festivus was actually not created by George’s father, Frank Costanza. The fake holiday was created well before the series was even conceived in 1966 by an editor of Reader’s Digest…

I think the idea here is that, even if you’re having sex (of which you should not be having too much, because God forbid you break your vagina and lose…

he is a ‘long struggling poet’ with ‘extreme reverance for art’ and is thus pretty socially isolated and critical towards me in sort of obvious ways

You constantly feel pangs of envy when looking at people’s Instagrams and Twitter feeds. Is everyone in the world having more fun than you are? Answer: No, they’re just better…

For those of us who indulged in the show’s feel-good-moments that always culminated in a corny emotional scene, full of sappy music and valuable life lessons, we wonder.

The phone numbers of people you should never have the option to contact again if and when temptation strikes, social media connections with the people you feel you have to…

We’re masochists. We doll ourselves up every night for a city that’s just going to end up giving us a black eye anyway. It’s our glamorous version of a bad…

When you’re dating a narcissist you forever feel like you’re the one going after them. If it doesn’t work out with you, WHATEVER, because the narcissist will just easily coast…

In Inglorious Basterds, Sherlock Holmes is referred to at least two times.

She may’ve first became relevant through sex but as soon as Kim Kardashian got her foot in the door, she switched the narrative on us. All of a sudden, we…

It’s not that you’re sad. In fact, you’re happier than you’ve been in recent memory. You’re just not interested in doing things socially just for the sake of doing them.