Katie Mather

Infinity Scarf: Conversations with you, like your scarf, seem to go in circles and last forever.

Your hair is so big because it’s full of secrets. (Seriously, you know every horrible and intimate detail about everyone.)

We all know feminism is an excuse for women to hate men. This guy posted about it on the internet, so it’s gotta be true.

Northeast: You’ll reluctantly wear white on your wedding day, but you really wish it were socially acceptable to be in a slimming, black dress instead.

Charlotte: Stole your boyfriend, doesn’t care.

Spencer: Went surfing once, puts the surfer guy emoji next to his name when he puts his name into your phone.

Take a double shot when you successfully have a nonverbal shit-talking conversation about someone right in front of them.

“We should totally get lunch or something!”: You. Are. A. Liar.

While you spent all of high school trying to be Tumblr famous, David Karp spent all of high school creating Tumblr.

When you’ve reached peak discomfort and the doctor is effectively satisfied with how miserable and embarrassed you are, the OB begins to beg you to “please relax your legs”—a request that will be made repeatedly throughout the appointment.

The whole notion of “unconditional familial love” was squashed the second it was time to get food. It was like everyone decided to behave like a Yelp Elite food critic when the time came to pick what restaurant you were going to for dinner.

Hopper’s trailer apparently cost the art department $1 to buy.