Only assholes recline their seats – When stuck in economy, and craving for a little more space, remember everyone else is stuck in economy too. Treat your fellow man with respect—don’t recline your seat.
Oh, so Kathy, who I used to watch throw up just so she could drink more, is now expecting her first kid? Great. This block of cheddar cheese and I are expecting our first baby too.
When I tried to call them back, it didn’t ring once. The voicemail automatically picked up. A girl that couldn’t have been much older than seven said, “Stephanie,“ the vowels long and sing-song. I flinched at my name, but continued listening.
Having the need for constant contact can be a huge turnoff. Relying on another person for 100% of your happiness well inevitably leave you disappointed.
A roommate I had in college was a strange guy. This guy came from the other side of the country (I’m US). He went out at all hours of the night, never showed up for class, slept during the day, and drank more energy drinks than is healthy. His parents were worried about him, apparently, and hired a PI to trail him.
In a world fueled by technology, the idea of using the Internet to find a romantic connection with someone sounds too efficient… and easy.
Girls who get texts at midnight are simply afterthoughts, and you deserve his full attention at any hour of any day.
“Found his wife having a love affair, so he cut off the man’s head and preserved it in a jar so that he could have his wife visit it daily.”
You know why we’re all so “afraid of committing?” It’s because you’re afraid the other person is afraid of committing, and you don’t want to be the only one begging.
Willing to work for free to prove yourself is a great little distinction. But it’s worthless by itself.
You really don’t want to meet anyone on an app. And it’s not that you don’t realize that it’s honestly similar to meeting someone randomly at a bar, you’re just sick of the endless swiping.
Even when we delete, erase, do our best to make it appear that chapter is done, we won’t ever fully scrub ourselves clean. We can always go back. We can find ghosts as easily as scrolling back 57 weeks.
I’ve compiled a thorough list of evidence on how the “Black Mirror” universe is connected, and also a rough timeline. So sit down and strap in, because we’ve got some work to do.
Capri Suns are still as delicious as they have always been and you can buy as many as you want.
Oprah didn’t know she’d become the poster woman for self-improvement and success, she was just trying to do a job. You don’t need to know what you’re doing to still do something extraordinary.
You always burn yourself when you’re drinking coffee or tea because you can’t wait for it to cool down.
Caller: I need the police, there is a wild rabbit in my garden eating my garden vegetables.
