4. Remember this? Aw, here’s the first squirt of blood
When I moved cities in grade 2 or 3 I didn’t know anyone. I met someone the first day and he invited me to his house that weekend to stay over. Everything was great, we played GameCube and stayed up until 3am (the latest I had been awake up to that point). He said we had to sleep in the basement so that we don’t wake his parents when we went upstairs. We go downstairs with our sleeping bags and immediately I knew something was wrong. The worst smell I’ve ever experienced filled my nostrils the further we descended. In the corner of the room was a bed covered in what looked like crusty blood and some pus-coloured streaks. Turns out his mother had a home birth the week before and kept the sheets as a memento. I haven’t been back since.
5. Water costs money
When my brother and I were kids, we would often comment that our next door neighbor’s house smelled like pee.
One day my brother was playing video games with the kid from next door (at his house) and asked to use the restroom.
The kid said, “We just pee here,” and started peeing in the closet. My brother peed in there too.
When in Rome…
6. I’m so stoked for this 42″ TV that I’ll use next year
We were getting something out of his dad’s closet when I noticed there was a ton of expensive electrical equipment in the back of it, all still boxed up. I asked him about it. Apparently his dad keeps everything new he gets for a year before he unboxes it and actually uses it. He didn’t know why, and it still boggles my mind.
