Callie Byrnes

This will make you look at marriage pacts differently for the rest of your life.

It happened for the first time when I wasn’t paying attention. There wasn’t any monumental moment where I knew. One day I just woke up and it was there: “Oh, I’m in love with you.”  And that was that.

Say goodbye to the hours of painstaking work you put into your brand.

I’m not crying, you’re crying.

No one understands me like Abbi and Ilana do.

It’s all fun and games until you find out you’ve got the same boo.

“The freezer door is heavy. So there’s no way. If they’re saying she’s drunk, she don’t have no strength,” her sister said.

Here are some of the best neon signs that’ll spice up any party and also make you forget that your life is completely falling apart.

Definitive proof that you don’t mess with Texas.

Which dead-and-gone T Swift persona are you?

I guess I just never get the closure I need to move past things, so I have to create my own.

Still too soon.

Maybe I’ll fail to show up for our coffee date and then go weeks without answering a single one of your texts before I hit you up with a “Oh, hey, what’s up?” But, like, that’s not really my fault, you know? I’m a good friend, but I’m also a Pisces.

I AM NEVER SLEEPING AGAIN.

I love when people give me nicknames, even when I say I hate them. There aren’t a lot of fun, cute ways to shorten my name, but there’s still something so intimate when someone finds a way to, anyway. I like the feeling that someone knows me so well that we become an informality; I like knowing that they, and they alone, have a word that stands just for me.

This is the ending the girlfriend and the other girl deserve.

Scorpio: Play mind games. While you might find it fun playing dating games — leaving them on “read”, being secretive, sending cryptic snapchats — Scorpios won’t have it. They don’t like people who seem deceptive and indecisive, which they’ll probably attribute your behavior to. Want to see a Scorpio disappear? Just send them a selfie of you looking fire with a hot dude at a bar and trust me, he’ll be gone in an instant.

Fuckboys are evolving, but women are keeping up.