Latest From
Thought Catalog
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Intervention: Erin Is Addicted To Meth, Men And Wearing Booty Shorts
Today Erin’s life is very ho-hum. Her husband Jim goes to work at a place called Christian World while she lounges in her bra and booty shorts, smokes meth and…
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Ten Best Celebrity Twitters
When celebrities use Twitter, it can be a double-edged sword. On one hand, they’re able to create a faux personal relationship with their fans and enhance their brand and marketability.…
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How to Live in New York City
Go home for the holidays and run into old friends from high school. When you tell them that you live in New York, watch their eyes widen. They’ll say, “Oh…
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5 Typical Acts of Politeness That are Inefficient and Should be Banned
What’s especially inefficient is when you stop for me on a busy two-lane road and I have to begin walking in front of you, only to realize that I have…
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Eight Ways Twilight is Better Than Real Life
The Twilight series of books/films is widely perceived to be bad, sexist and potentially in possession of a ‘Mormon agenda,’ even by people who have not consumed any of the…
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How to be a 20-Something
Work at a coffee shop but feel hopeful about your career in advertising, writing, whatever. Remember that you’re young and that the world is your oyster. Everything is possible, you…
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Top 10 Animals That Don’t Have Butts
One of the largest, softest, most complex areas of the human body is the ass. That asses are both sexual and fecal seems vaguely confusing. One considers the dual nature…
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Top Ten Celebrity Excuses for Acting Completely Insane
The only thing celebrities love more than themselves is lying. Exhaustion, asthma attacks, allergic reactions: These are the official reasons why celebrities do such nutty things but we know the…
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Drugs I Will Never Try
If I tried heroin, I would love it so much, I would want to marry it. Not just because it’s heroin and everyone loves it but because that opiate high…
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How To Become Unsatisfied In a Long-Term Relationship
Feel resigned about the fact that sex sometimes doesn’t happen for weeks. Start to feel apathetic about lack of intimacy, orgasm and physical touch. Become overly silly. Hide the fact…
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Things My Five-Year Old Has Said, Which I Have Quoted on Twitter
Eli is my five-year old son. He has an older brother, Slade. Slade writes fiction and spends a substantial amount of time on FlipNotes, so he rarely says anything worth…
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Guide To Vague Relationships
A vague relationship basically feels like a real relationship, only it’s harder to tell when it’s okay to cuddle. Vague relationships can last anywhere from 0 to 8 years, but…
