25 Domestically Abused Men Reveal Their Horrifying Stories

After a few more physical incidents, including her kicking me very hard after going behind her back and purchasing a new laptop for school, I confronted her and told her that if she ever struck me again, the relationship was over and I would kick her out of the house. After that things dissolved into pretty much daily arguments. During this time she was getting very friendly with another guy and spending quite a bit of time with him; after one argument where I locked myself in my office with her banging on the door, she stalked off and spent the next two days with him. I was jealous at first, but started to see a way out.

I’ll admit to being very passive-aggressive about this, but I started ignoring her more. I continued to lock myself in my office, playing video games and doing homework. The arguments got worse, but never got physical; I admit I held the threat of kicking her out over her head. It was a bit hollow as she was technically a tenant at this point and I would have had to go through the legal eviction process; I was worried she would destroy my house if she was given that much time. She gave me an ultimatum one day: One more fight and she would be gone.

The next day I was completely fed up with the arguments, so instead of coming home after work I went to my folks’ house. I sat there, played some video games and watched a ball game with them. The texts from her came and kept coming; I counted at least 20-30 of them. She called a few times and I ignored them. She started having her friends call me, which I ignored, and I started receiving calls from a restricted number. I was gone perhaps four hours, and I had received a ton of texts and at least ten phone calls. Then my mom’s phone started ringing. She answered one from a restricted number, and it was this girl’s mom… asking where I was. My mom told her I was with them, ended the conversation and we had a little talk about this. I really didn’t want to go home. I ended up checking her Facebook profile and she posted pictures of her cutting herself with a pair of scissors, under a caption stating that it was me that was driving her to do this.

When I finally got home, it was a blowout fight. I don’t remember the details, but I threw her overly close friendship with another guy into her face and told her I was sick and tired of the double standards. Somehow we ended up making nice and ending things on a somewhat good note. When I got off work the next day she was gone, along with most of her stuff. I ended up celebrating by buying a big TV, like I had wanted to get earlier but she kept on telling me no.

I wish the story had ended there, but she kept on harassing my friends as well as myself; asking my friends to ‘smack him for me because he broke my heart’ and telling her friends I had raped her. She finally came to get the rest of her things after I threatened to throw them out; as she left she told me she had been cheating on me with her guy friend. I was beyond done at that point. I ended up having to threaten her with pressing criminal harassment charges to get her to stop. At this point, it was May of 2010.

Years later the damage is still there. I really can’t afford surgery (well, that and I’m deathly afraid of being put under, so I refuse to get it done) on my knee at this point. It likely didn’t heal up correctly and will still dislocate itself on occasion. Thankfully these have been happening less and less; I was experiencing one every couple of weeks. Now it’s only a couple of times a year, and I haven’t had one happen since January. I spent a period of time unemployed(another long story I’d rather not get into), after which I managed to find work in my given field. It’s mostly a desk job, versus the rather physical retail gig I had at the family business. I’m working both places part-time, though might be going back to my office job full-time later on. I do continue to wear a knee brace at times, but over four years later it’s been getting at least somewhat better.

The emotional scars are definitely still there. I have absolutely no patience or tolerance in relationships anymore, and for a period of time after that breakup I pursued a series of short flings. It’s been four years and I haven’t had a major relationship since then, and it’s been just under three years since I’ve last dated, been intimate with, or even held hands with anyone else. Despite quite a bit of therapy I’ve come to the conclusion that I really don’t want to date again. I’ve still got my house. I’ve got two rare sports cars that I spend my time on, I’ve got two awesome cats, and I’m on the verge of starting my own computer repair business. Life for me isn’t perfect, but it’s the best it could be considering the path it could have taken.

13. I can’t seem to make heads of this

I was. I’ve previously told the story of how the one mormon girl I dated beat the shit out of me for nearly an hour because I refused to lay a hand on her – worst ass whipping of my life at the hands of a 110 pound girl.

At some point, when she’d punched herself out, I went to the bathroom to get cleaned up. My blood was splattered up the wall. I washed my face off, surveyed the damage, and the adrenaline wore off. I stumbled back, hit the towel rack (Ow.), and slid down the wall until I was sitting next to the toilet.

This was when she came in, realized what she’d done, and sat on my lap. She gave me a hug and told me she loved me, and I swear I heard my psyche just snap.

Fine. I can’t hit her. But I can drive her insane, show her things she never wanted to see. So I stood up, bleeding profusely down my front, and started laughing a way I’ve never laughed before. She backed up, fell out the bathroom door, and I came out hot on her heels. I got right in her face, blood pouring down my face, from one of my eyes, my nose, one of my ears, my arms.. and just whispered, very quietly.. “Do it, hit me again. Does it make you right, in the eyes of your lord?”

And then I laughed, and laughed.. and I kept laughing until she hit me again to shut me up.. and when she tried to swing again, I caught her hand. Then her other hand. And then I went full on Kajiri on her and spit a mouthful of blood in a mist all in her face.

“You’re worthless. You’re nothing. You will never be anything to anyone. And you’ll always remember this.”

She broke, crumpled.. and I went to change my now bloody clothes, and when I came out, she was trying to overdose on melatonin. I told her she was pathetic, and called an ambulance. She ran out the back door, and that was the end of that..


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