Top 10 Hottest Cartoon Characters (The Bisexual Edition)

Ever wanted to bang a cartoon character? It’s OK—there’s no shame in it. We’ve all fantasized from time-to-time about some expertly penned hands expertly penning us. There’s a sense of mystery entirely devoid from human crushes—the sort that makes you wonder exactly what is it that would confront you should you find yourself pulling Aladdin’s pants off (with your teeth, you dirty thing!) or unhooking Ariel’s clam bra.

Kate George is the Managing Editor at Portable.tv. Lives like Die Hard but with a Katy Perry vibe. Follow her on ...

Irony: Woman Dies At Her Own Funeral

Meanwhile, in Russia, after being wrongfully declared dead by doctors for a suspected heart attack, 49-year-old woman Fagilyu Mukhametzyanov woke up mid-funeral and then died, for good, from heart failure most likely the consequence of shock related to “hearing people pray for her soul.” But not before she started screaming.

I am Brandon Scott Gorrell and I am pumped!!!
 

The 5 Smells That Remind Me Of Being A Teenager

Remember cloves? They smelled like beautiful incense but every puff deleted about five years off of your life expectancy. I think they’re illegal now because they contained fiberglass, which is apparently a no good very terrible thing for your body.

I write and edit Thought Catalog. I'm a brat. Send me fun things at ryan@thoughtcatalog.com

Chat Acronyms Exposed

Glib, detached, oft taken for granted, the following chat and text acronyms are examined and exposed for both their oblique intent and implication herein.

Jimmy Chen writes essays, criticism, and satire. He also contributes at HTMLGIANT, among other places, and ...

All Ghosts are Cavemen Ghosts

As far as I can tell, they just knock stuff over all day long like it’s a full time job. This would indicate to me that ghosts are either mentally handicapped versions of their living selves (unlikely) or they’re cavemen ghosts.

Brad Pike is a writer and performer in Chicago. His writing has been featured on The Sixth Wall, Thought Catalog, The ...
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