Social Justice Porn
The deep, forgiving cushion of your favorite armchair as you sink in to change the world via the Macbook warming your lap. The inviting “like” button on status updates from area non-profits.
The deep, forgiving cushion of your favorite armchair as you sink in to change the world via the Macbook warming your lap. The inviting “like” button on status updates from area non-profits.
You are probably the most put-together adult I’ve ever met. Can I meet you? I want to be as put together as you are. Please?
Most employees made their real income by stealing items and re-selling them on eBay. Some stole for personal use, usually the younger employees who were just there as a student job and therefore didn’t need the money as badly, but everyone stole.
“We’ll see you again soon.” What does that mean? Does he want to see me again personally? Why can’t people just say what they mean?!
There is a moment in the book early in Grant’s career as a soldier where he was sent to hunt down a band of guerrillas, shaking with fear as he arrived at their camp only to find they had run away. It was then that he realized the enemy was often as scared of you as you were of them. It changed his approach to battle forever.
You begin to wonder how your romantic life would look from the outside and you start thinking of your hookups as types.
7. Have something going on your television that would be on even if you weren’t drinking.
Chick lit, makeup, pedicures, long bubble baths—these are some of the best parts about being alive. No one questions my manhood because I like to feel good and indulge in life’s little pleasures.
When they play with kids or animals, hold babies, talk about their future kids or admit that they sometimes think of potential names for their spawn– these men exist I have encountered this rare species and I am here to tell you it is not folklore.
You don’t have to tell people you date that you come as a package deal. They know. And if they don’t, they will when they’re laying next to you the next morning while you’re on the phone with said best friend telling them everything that happened last night.
5. If you attempt to hit on me with racially charged pick-up lines, I will take the drink you bought for me and splash it over your head. I will respond favorably to neither “ni hao” nor “hello, China doll.”
Hey, sometimes a person writes from their bitter heart about a terrible relationship that really has no ground to stand on.
15. If you’re driving in D.C. please make sure there’s ample amount of air in your tires, potholes will tear your wheels apart.