The Love You Want Isn't Always The Love You Deserve
Romance

The Love You Want Isn’t Always The Love You Deserve

This took me a long time to figure out. I couldn’t understand when people said to me, you can do better than so-and-so. Because what does “better” even mean? If I want to be with someone, and they make me happy, how can “better” be a real thing?

Well, it is, and its sometimes hard to see when you’re in the moment, or when you’re reeling from heartbreak. The love you want isn’t always the love you deserve, and that’s a really difficult distinction to make most times, if the person in question isn’t obviously bad for you in any way you can decipher.

You need someone who will lift you up. Who has as much drive and ambition as you do. Who wants to go to the places you want to go. Who will support you on the way there. Someone who isn’t jealous of your accomplishments, but praises them. Someone who isn’t looking to compete with you, but be in a partnership.

You think you know what you want right now, but its important to learn to put aside the need for instant gratification and see things in the light of the long term. Garner enough self confidence to know what you are better than.

You deserve someone who loves you right now, just as you are. And realizing that you are worth more than somebody has to offer is unbelievably empowering. Its fueled by a sense of self. It only comes from completely realizing what we’re worth. The trick is that once we know this, we can’t turn back.

Yes, love is blind, and things like status or income or success don’t factor into how we feel about someone. I mean this on a much more macro level. You deserve someone who is “on your level,” for the lack of a better term. You shouldn’t have to be rolling your eyes and waiting for someone to grow up for them to become worthy of your time. If you don’t love them now, you deserve more. Don’t sell yourself short. TC mark

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Brianna Wiest is the author of I Am The Hero Of My Own Life, Salt Water, and 101 Essays That Will Change The Way You Think. Follow Brianna on Instagram or read more articles from Brianna on Thought Catalog.