Lorenzo Jensen III

“God could not be everywhere, and therefore he made mothers.”
—Rudyard Kipling

“Who runs the world? Girls.”
—Beyoncé Knowles

“Marriage is a great institution, but I’m not ready for an institution.”

“No matter how long the winter, spring is sure to follow.”

“Dogs never bite me. Just humans.”
—Marilyn Monroe

1. You can’t blame gravity for falling in love. —Albert Einstein 2. The higher you build walls around your heart, the harder you fall when someone tears them down. —Unknown 3.

“He started believing he was a vampire. I began seeing him as having a not having a terribly strong grip on reality.”

“The best sign of a healthy relationship is no sign of it on Facebook.”

“She sent me a video of herself in underwear. Waved at the camera, took a blade to her wrist, wiped the blood into her fingers and waved goodbye.”

“One key difference: BOOBS.”

“People who think nothing is ever their fault.”

“She lets me watch cartoons, and she hates cartoons.”

“That I’m not actually divorced.”

“Everyone who ever loved you was wrong.”

“He would frequently bite his tongue and spit HIV-positive blood into their faces/mouths.”

“It’s hard to be mean when you’re stoned.” —Bill Lee

12. I love a girl that blushes.

4. Green eyes.