1. They call everything quaint. I’m always hearing something being called quaint, or vintage, or oldey worldey, or oh my godddd just like Harry Potter! (FYI, all castles look the same, stop wasting your money.)
There was something primal and frightening in the look of men’s eyes. I wouldn’t have wanted to be alone dressed this way.
‘If you know where we are please bomb us… There is no life after this. I’m going to kill myself anyway – others have killed themselves this morning.’
To all the guys who have ever started texting a girl, only to at some point to disappoint them by never texting them back ever again, I have message for you – you are the worst.
You get to spend the next 2-ish hours in the dark, directly next to the object of your affection with absolutely no pressure to come up with something funny to say. Sounds foolproof, no?
11. You hang out at coffee shops (or milk tea houses) and just stare at people and wonder if they are going through the same phase as you.
I was at a corner store the other day picking up some late snacks after work, when a man was telling the counter person how that “faggot” gave him a look.
It’s easy to feel out-gentleman’d by the historical romances we read and watch, where the dashing knight or prince woos his beloved with some pretty serious chivalrous moves.
Hangovers demand a light at the end of the tunnel, a reason to go on and actually leave your bed.
Perhaps it’s petty to operate from a place where there’s such a thing as “winners” and “losers” in a break up, but sometimes you have to get that low to rise up and feel like a worthy human once again.…
