Thought Catalog

Lauren Jarvis-Gibson

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You weren’t supposed to be the one to leave.
To be the one I called my own
when you already knew I wasn’t your destination.
To be the one I called my home
when you already knew I was only a vacation.

If you are strong enough, and if you are brave enough, you will not see this illness as a flaw, or something to try to erase. You will see it as another reason to love and to adore her. You will see it as something she has, but not something that she is.

You are loud, and you are persistent. You know how to get under my skin, and you know how to give me goosebumps on every inch of my body. But, I will never let you take full control. I will never let you gain my whole heart.

You are pining after someone who has already left, someone who has stomped on your heart and has left you alone. You are pining after someone who has taken advantage of what you have to give. Who has taken advantage of the love that you offered them.

When anxiety takes over, you may not know it. You may not know the seriousness of it. You may not know it has taken ahold of you. You may think it’s silly. You might even listen to those people, when they tell you it’s not a big deal. You might even listen to them, when they tell you it will go away on it’s own.

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