11 Things Your Partner Doesn’t Realize You’re Doing Because Of Your Anxiety

Joe Yates

1. You take funny comments or jokes to heart.

Even when your partner is totally joking and being playful with you, you are extremely sensitive to it. You take their every comments to heart because in your head, you’re wondering, what if that’s true? 

2. You isolate yourself.

Sometimes, you just need to be alone with only you and your thoughts. It can happen out of the blue and without warning. This might confuse the heck out of your significant other, but sometimes you need to re-energize. Being in your head all the time is exhausting and alone time helps.

3. You always question whether or not your significant other is serious about you.

You always need so much reassurance from them that they actually do want to be with you. You’re constantly wondering why you even deserve their love, because it seems so bizarre and foreign to you. You can’t shut off the thoughts in your brain that think, ‘they are going to leave’. 

4. When you get into an argument you completely shut down.

When you argue, you immediately go silent. Confrontation and fights makes you extremely uncomfortable and stressed out, so you protect yourself by not saying anything at all. After every argument, it will take a few days until everything is back to normal, because it sends your anxiety skyrocketing.

5. You constantly are asking your partner for reassurance.

If they tell you you look good today, you have to ask them again and again until you believe they are serious. When they ask to be your boyfriend or girlfriend, you usually will need reassurance that they truly want that. The list goes on and on, but you need reminding all the time that they want you and only you.

6. You get jealous easily even though you know you can trust your partner.

When your significant other goes out with friends or sees their family without you, you overthink as to reasons why they went without you. Your brain goes into overdrive, wondering what you did wrong or what you said wrong, and when you see them out with other people your anxiety tells you it’s because of you.

7. When they tell you they love you, it’s hard for you to take it seriously.

Because your anxiety is constantly shutting your self esteem down and making you feel like nothing, to have someone love you is really scary for you. When your partner tells you that they love you, you question how much truth is in it. You always ask them to tell you reasons, and to only say it if they mean it, because your anxiety tells you that love leads to heartbreak.

8. When you don’t hear from them for a few days, you automatically assume they are going to leave you.

Your anxiety likes to trick your mind into thinking that everything is on you, and everything is your fault. If your partner spends a few days without you or days without talking with you, you freak out. You don’t want to seem needy, but inside, your anxiety is screaming that your significant other is officially done with you.

9. You have sex with the lights off, especially in the beginning of the relationship.

You love your partner and you love sex, but sometimes you can’t have the lights shining on all the parts of you that make you feel undesirable. Most of the time, you go to bed with them in dimly lit lighting, to reassure yourself that they can’t see the imperfect pieces of you.

10. When you meet your partner’s friends, you go to extreme lengths in order for them to like you.

When you meet your partner’s friends and family, you get extremely anxious and your anxiety tells you all the reasons they won’t like you. So, you usually try really hard, especially with your partner’s parents and rehearse what you are going to say to them before you meet them.

11. You question your love for them.

Even though deep down you know you love them, sometimes you question your own heart. Your anxiety sometimes can make you second guess yourself and downplay your gut instincts. Sometimes, you really do think to yourself, do I truly love this person? Is this person really a good fit for me? Usually, people with anxiety question their own love, in order to guard themselves and not get hurt. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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Lauren Jarvis-Gibson

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