Method: “Pull out”
Summary: Man orgasms elsewhere.
Commentary: Let us examine pre-ejaculatory fluid (colloquially “pre cum”), a translucent viscous fluid containing sperm cells that oozes out of the meatus some time between erection and orgasm. Said to neutralize residual acidity in the urethra, pre cum also acts as a lubricant during sex, and while it’s not an entire “load,” all it takes is one single sperm cell to penetrate the egg. Pulling out (fml. coitus interruptus) is generally considered an irresponsible form of contraception, for should our amateur pull out too late, if only by one fateful contraction, then we have both a mess and a problem. And yet, there is a certain thrill to this method, in both the risk of conception and the anticipation of ejaculating on the female (usually by default i.e. the buttocks or abdomen; though, if the female is quick and well-tempered, the face), though we do not advise it.
Chance of pregnancy: 15-28%
Other factors: Ponderous clean up; awkward afterglow; cum crust.
Male pleasure: ★★★