Jacob Geers

“I’d rather have a blowhard like Trump than a religious nutter like Carson or Cruz.”

We love the ’90s so much it’s almost as if we can’t leave the ’90s.

The American wizard governing body is the “Magical Congress of the United States of America,” and the current President is Samuel G. Quahog.

Angelica is now out of drug rehab and enrolled in classes at a local community college to finish her degree. She worries that going back to work might re-trigger her drug addiction, so she is still supported by her guilt-ridden mother, who thoroughly blames herself for how everything worked out.

“Yes. A Muslim man blew me up, and I lost my leg.”

I walked in on a random girl alone in my dorm room. She was squatting over my roommates pillow and shitting on it. I just walked out of the room.

Some sick people are applauding or excusing today’s Colorado shooter.

So many deals, so little money!

Is this satire?

Me and Dave were buddies. What I didn’t know was that Dave was on probation. He had just finished a 15 year bid for murder. But that wasn’t all. That was the FIFTH time he been brought to trial for 5 separate murders. It was only on the fifth trial that they got a conviction.

Will upvote for love.

One of the individuals who spent some time with Malia said she “wasn’t doing anything crazy.”

To the girls singing at the stop sign, please read the sign again 😂😂.

We’re a little weird — don’t unfollow us for it!

“If being good at Divination means I have to pretend to see death omens in a lump of tea leaves, I’m not sure I’ll be studying it much longer!”

Even this cat is shocked by the stupid sh*t people are saying.

That escalated quickly.

Do dads write these jokes?