Holly Riordan

If I have to wait for you to make the first move, then I will, because I don’t want to pressure you or guilt you into a relationship with me. I want you to realize you like me on your own and make a conscious decision to turn me into your girlfriend.

Lean forward just enough to put your breast in his mouth. He won’t mind it. In fact, he might even come from it.

I don’t want to get my hopes up by imagining what it would be like to marry a certain man, and then end up getting my heart broken when it doesn’t actually happen.

But as much as I love what we’ve become, I still miss what we were. I miss the sexual tension that felt like fire between us.

History: You love to learn, which is why you’ll have the most fun walking through a museum together, holding hands and discussing the origin of paintings and sculptures.

If we fast forward to love, we’ll end up missing out on precious moments that only new couples have.

“I was almost kidnapped when I was four and it is one of my most vivid memories.”

“Woke up early in the morning. It was still dark. And I heard a bear snarl. Froze in my sleeping bag. Bear snarled again.”

If you get home late again, I’m going to spank you. But If you get home early, I’ll spank you even harder.

Getting kissed deeply while he’s pulling our hair with one hand and grabbing our ass with the other.

The reality: The cute guy you thought you had a connection with ends up dropping all contact with you. He doesn’t tell you why. He just stops answering your messages, so you have to move on to the next guy who’s bound to do the same exact thing.

We might’ve had some minor setbacks and an existential crisis or two, but look at us now. We’re still alive. We’re still doing whatever we can to create a worthwhile future for ourselves.

Don’t bother to set your alarm. I’m going to wake you up with oral.

Date someone who pulls over the car and bangs you on the hood of it, because they got turned on by your out-of-pitch voice singing along to the radio.

“Everyone’s obsessed with Kylie Jenner lips, but I don’t get it. Big or small? Doesn’t matter to me. As long as they’re soft.”

Why should I be the one to put my heart on the line when you’re just as capable of picking up your phone and typing out a message?

Bear – You have a drawer filled with handcuffs, blindfolds, and ball gags. Of course, you have a soft side, too. Once sex is over, you’ll be eager to cuddle until the sun rises.

Compliment her hair or her eyebrows. She’ll appreciate it more than a raunchy comment about her ass.