Madison Moore

7) You get a rejection letter from a job or a school but just like, WHATEVER. It’s their fault they didn’t take you. They will be sorry!

Even some presidents don’t believe in it.

Can we wait until it’s at least 75 degrees outside, everyone? Jesus.

There’s a party in your booty.

Nobody can work a front leg slit like Ciara can. NOBODY.

The month of March means 30 whole days of college students all across America celebrating a week off from school doing important volunteer work or, probably, lounging around in hot tubs and playing volleyball on Mexican beaches.

He sent it as a subtle reminder — or a preparedness warning, really. She brings it out, using one hand to cup the top of the phone so the bartender doesn’t see it, I guess. I’m pretty sure this exact situation has happened in front of him like 10,000 times already.

These are the worst foods to eat when you’re binging on Netflix from bed on those comfy Sunday afternoons.

11) You are not going to run into any surprise toenail clippings somebody forgot to clean up — unless they’re yours!

Saying “I love you” to a new person for the first time is big. But does it have to be?

Foods you used to love and binge eat while you watched the whole season of Battlestar Galactica in one day now make you sick to your stomach.

Are you a top or a bottom? The wrong answer can ruin a perfectly good Saturday night.

But every time you miss something about the other person, think about two things you hated. If the things you hated add up to more than the things you liked, it’s time to let go.

Please bore someone else with your…questions.

If someone suddenly and magically disappears into thin air right when you need them most, that person is fake.

When you’re dating a narcissist you forever feel like you’re the one going after them. If it doesn’t work out with you, WHATEVER, because the narcissist will just easily coast to the next relationship.

Is it possible to have friends who are purely for the Internet, and others you get to interact with out in actual society?

Naked parties, naked runs, and other acts of synchronized stripping in the middle of campus. Usually occurs during finals week.