1. They expect more from you than they’re willing to give to you. If you don’t answer their texts in ten minutes, they freak out, even though they take days to answer your messages. It’s the same with hangout sessions. They expect you to be available whenever they invite you over, even though they claim they’re too busy to see you all the time. They want you to drop everything for them, but they’re not willing to return the favor. The relationship is unbalanced, unequal, unfair.
2. They refuse to take responsibility for their actions. When you call them out on ignoring your texts or treating you poorly in general, they act like they have no idea what you’re talking about and laugh it off. Or immediately change the subject. Or sweet talk you until you completely forget the question you asked in the first place. No matter what method they use, they never take responsibility for their actions. They never admit to being in the wrong. They never give out apologies.
3. Every interaction you have with them makes you more stressed out. They are draining. You miss them when you’re apart from them, but honestly, you’re relieved to leave after spending even a small amount of time with them. They are always involved in some sort of drama. They are always finding new ways to bring down your happiness. Your excitement to see them fades pretty quickly after your first few minutes together because they’re never as fun as the version you have of them in your head.
4. They don’t put any effort toward supporting you. They don’t check in on you randomly to see how you’ve done on your big test or the presentation at work you mentioned the other day. They don’t even pretend to be interested when you come to them with exciting news you’re personally pumped about revealing. They simply don’t seem to care about the things you do. It doesn’t make a difference to them whether you succeed or fail. Sometimes, it seems like they like it better when you fail.
5. They can’t hold a conversation without lying. They lie about the stupidest little things, things that don’t even make a difference to you, but it takes away your trust in them. It makes you feel like you can never rely on them for the full story because they are constantly twisting the truth to make themselves sound more intelligent, more exciting, more interesting. And if you try to call them out on it, it’s only going to start a fight.
6. They won’t change their behavior after hurting you. If they’ve done something to upset you, and you’ve told them they’ve upset you, then they should take your feelings into consideration. They shouldn’t continue to do whatever they want without worrying about the consequences. They shouldn’t act like what you want means nothing to them. If they refuse to better themselves for your sake, or for their own sake, then you’re better off keeping your distance.