Canvas Bag

You care deeply about the Earth, unlike those plastic bag wielding environment destroyers who are ruining everything. Or if you don’t care about the Earth, then you probably got it for free at some dumb event event you went to and you like free shit and you need a bag so what else are you going to do. Or if you don’t care about the Earth AND didn’t get it from some dumb event you are almost definitely in graduate school and like to advertise that you went to Harvard Law or whatever the fuck. You have so many of these things from all the dumb events and schools and whatever. You never wash the thing so it’s kind of gross looking. You use it for laundry when you don’t feel like lugging a hamper all the way to the laundromat. You always use it when you go grocery shopping. Canvas bags do everything.