Lorenzo Jensen III

“You can be your normal dorky and weird self around her and she still likes you. That’s super cool.”

“She lets me watch cartoons, and she hates cartoons.”

“That I’m not actually divorced.”

“Everyone who ever loved you was wrong.”

“He would frequently bite his tongue and spit HIV-positive blood into their faces/mouths.”

“It’s hard to be mean when you’re stoned.” —Bill Lee

12. I love a girl that blushes.

4. Green eyes.

1. The way their back muscles move when they reach to grab something.

“When I realized that my best friend didn’t consider me hers.”

Found on AskReddit. 1. Touch the guards. You can mess around in front of them and they’ll ignore you, but touch them and prepare for a world of hurt. 2.

Found on AskReddit. 1. “At some point, sex became a chore for her.” At some point, sex became a chore for her.

“It’s a baby doll being dragged by slowly by a string. He got out of there fast as he could.”

They say the best revenge is living well. I say it’s acid in the face—who will love them now? —Mindy Kaling

Found on AskReddit. 1. Cowards. Cowards. Have several friends that have committed suicide in the last year. They left children that will always wonder what they could have done. 2. They are just passing their pain to other people.

“It’s hard to go through life when your own brain has turned against you.”

1. How bad a period can make you feel.

“She went off her meds and came at me with a butcher knife.”