Koty Neelis

You’re both going to change and evolve over the course of your relationship.

I followed the church of Lana Del Rey from the Midwest to NYC.

“I don’t have any problem understanding why people flunk out of college or quit their jobs or cheat on each other or break the law or spray-paint walls. A little bit outside of things is where some people feel each other. We do it to replace the frame of family. We do it to erase and remake our origins in their own images. To say, I too was here.”

“This is an important lesson to remember when you’re having a bad day, a bad month, or a shitty year. Things will change: you won’t feel this way forever. And anyway, sometimes the hardest lessons to learn are the ones your soul needs most. I believe you can’t feel real joy unless you’ve felt heartache. You can’t have a sense of victory unless you know what it means to fail.”

It’s not just all in their head and they can’t just “get over” anxiety.

“I look at you and see all the ways a soul can bruise, and I wish I could sink my hands into your flesh and light lanterns along your spine so you know that there’s nothing but light when I see you.”

“There was never going to be an “us” because you wanted to be missed more than you wanted to be loved.”

“It’s never the changes we want that change everything.”

The scene: You’re going to your ex’s wedding. He’s not just any ex, he’s THE ex, the one you thought you were going to spend forever with, at least when you two were walking the halls of your liberal Midwestern college campus.

A home. Love. A relationship that could actually work. No, these are not the things that happen to bad people, to broken people, to people who come from an unconventional home.

They don’t let their emotions run their lives.

“Don’t lie about it. You made a mistake. Admit it and move on. Just don’t do it again. Ever.”

Once you hit premo best friend status your personality comes out in FULL FORCE.

“Kim Kardashian’s Selfish. Yeah, I said it. You actually get some good tips on taking selfies (stop judging, I know you take them).” – Ryan

“There is no point treating a depressed person as though she were just feeling sad, saying, ‘There now, hang on, you’ll get over it.’ Sadness is more or less like a head cold- with patience, it passes. Depression is like cancer.”

Reach out to them unexpectedly. Remind them they don’t have to do this alone.

You’re constantly striving to understand the human condition.

“My ex asked where I’m going, I said moving on to other things.”