January Nelson

There’s countless stories from multiple coworkers of weird shit happening while they were there alone (the sound of general commotion being heard through walls, someone whispering directly into their ear, doors and padlocks swinging for no reason, lights having a mind of their own, etc.)

Clefairy was going to be the mascot for Pokemon before they decided on Pikachu.

Planning is going to take up a huge chunk of your time — and you’re already busy enough. 

You’re stronger than you realize.

A grown out set of nice salon nails that are just a smidge past when they should have been filled in or redone.

Didn’t get asked out on a second date in college because my “FP” was too high. FP = fat potential.

VIRGO: You would try to psychoanalyze the ghost to figure out why it hasn’t crossed over to the other side yet. 

Your pet keeps staring at a certain area of the house — or stays far, far away from a certain area of the house — with no explanation.

His body was almost mummified because of the lack of sun, air and moisture. I can’t imagine what the smell was like.

Different people prioritize different things.

Pisces: They’ll try to break up with you several times because they can’t gather the courage to go through with it.

Slackbot might feel advanced sometimes, but I have to remind myself he’s like any other chatbot.

VIRGO: You lose your filter. You say the first thing that pops into your head without worrying about hurting feelings. 

“Technically, I pulled myself over.”

Your flirting could use some work.

Do yourself a favor and find someone new.

CANCER: He isn’t sorry he hurt you. He’s sorry you’re not around to feed his ego anymore.

Hugs and affection with no ulterior motive. Sometimes I like to be held without feeling like he’s wanting to fuck me.