I am too mature to wait for you to realize my worth. I have no problem with taking things slow, with pacing ourselves instead of rushing to meet each other’s parents and move in together. But I do have a problem with texting for months without ever meeting face-to-face. I do have a problem with hanging out for weeks without putting a label on what we are. I do have a problem with doubt and indecision.
I am too mature to play games. If you try to play hard to get by flirting with someone else, by mentioning how many other people want to date you, by acting like your schedule is too packed to make room for me, then I am going to assume you aren’t interested and move on. I’m not going to beg for your attention. I’m not going to convince you why you should choose me over everyone else. If you are caught between me and another option, pick them. I don’t want to be an afterthought. I want to be the only one.
I am too mature to play pretend. If you say something that confuses me, I am not going to stay up at night replaying the words in an attempt to figure out what you meant. If you treat me unfairly, I am not going to keep quiet to look chill and low-maintenance. I am going to ask you questions. I am going to speak my mind. I am going to be open about the way I’m feeling instead of walking around with a mask. I am not going to to erase my emotions make you feel more comfortable. That is not my style.
I am too mature for almost relationships. I am not going to waste my time texting you and driving to see you and kissing you if you aren’t willing to call me your girlfriend. I am not going to put all of my energy into you when you aren’t sure whether or not a real relationship is in our future. I am not going to settle for whatever you’re willing to give me when I have a clear vision of what I want — and what I want is a commitment. What I want is someone unafraid of staying loyal, of settling down.
I am too mature to feel embarrassed about being single. I no longer tell myself that I might as well date someone who fulfills half of my requirements because it’s better than being alone. I no longer lie to myself about how the chances of dying alone increase by the year. I no longer buy into the idea that I would be happier in a relationship. I am doing just fine on my own.
If a relationship that makes sense comes along, I will be happy to enter it. But until then — while I’m stuck dealing with people who ask to keep things casual and never say what they actually mean — I would rather stay single.