1. Weird animal noises
More weird than creepy but when I was in middle school I was sitting down outside and this girl came and sat down next to me, she faced me and started making animal noises, like barking, meowing, mooing the whole package, after a while she opened her backpack, wrote her number on a small piece of paper, folded it, put it on her lips, and then made weird humming noises.
She did this cute puppy look while the folded piece of paper was still on her lips, I hesitated taking it but I took it nonetheless.
2. Seriously, don’t bark
The ex of a friend of mine used to bark at people when we were in the car. It got so bad we had to lock the windows when she was with us. That should have been a big red flag but they stayed together till she cheated on him but that’s a whole different story.
3. Forcing a guy to have sex with you
When we were freshmen in college my suitemates and I befriended some junior transfer students in our dorm, who invited us to off-campus parties where we were always the only freshmen there. Much fun was had. One time though one of the girls whose apartment we were at tried to haul my friend, who was very very drunk, upstairs. He didn’t want to go, and at the foot of the stairs he was leaning back against her pulling him by the wrist with both hands.
It was the kind of thing, if I saw it today, I would intervene immediately, but that was 1993 and not one of us had the internal vocabulary to process it. A woman could be raped by a man, a man could be raped by another man, but we didn’t even have a concept of a woman raping a man.
Something deep inside me was unsettled, but I couldn’t process it. I was a little drunk myself, which wasn’t helping me make any big leaps in ethical thinking. I just nervously laughed like my other friends. She relented, but I’m pretty sure it was because people were laughing and it was starting to be humiliating how hard he was struggling to not go upstairs with her. We continued to hang out with that crowd, but I kept my distance from her from then on.
4. Being too direct
I had a colleague get wasted at a professional conference, grope me, and slur “Yyyou wanna ffffuck me?” in the conference hotel lobby.
We had had no intimate contact or even flirtation between us at that point. I had known her for…4 days?
5. Falling in love with us too fast
Showed up at my work and dropped the L word on me in txt about 24 hours after initial contact.
6. Not giving up after a dude says he’s not interested
This lady who used to come into my work would flirt with me pretty hardcore but I was pretty much completely oblivious until she got one of the girls I work with to give me a note with her phone number. I was not even a little interested so I did my best to handle it delicately and told her that I wasn’t interested and that I had actually just started a relationship anyway (turns out that was not a good idea).
She started asking all my coworkers about me and my relationship and telling them that she hoped my relationship failed so she could have another try. It got to the point that I had to tell all my coworkers not to talk to her about me and my managers offered to talk to her and tell her that she needed to stop. Then she got deferred for lying to us and couldn’t donate any more. I did a happy dance when I found out she was never coming back.
7. Becoming a stalker or tracking guys on our phones
Stalk me. Even to the point of moving into my secured condo building to live closer to me.
Installed tracking apps on my phone and a tracker on my cars without my knowledge.
The girl was just the creepy equivalent of how a guy would be conceived as creepy among guys.
8. Finding our where we work and stalking us there
The day after our first date, she told me that she wanted to introduce me to her best friend. Later that night, they showed up at my work. I worked in retail at the time, and I told her which chain I worked for, but not the location.
9. Being straight up crazy
New chick got hired at work. Wore a ton of makeup and was flirting with me nonstop for the first 3 days. I was pretty okay with it but of course being the goody two shoes Catholic I am I was very hesitant to respond to any of it.
At some point in time I discovered she had a fiance she has been engaged to for 7 years and has a kid with him. I discovered this shortly after she asked a series of bizarre questions (“How many times a week do you masturbate? Are you virgin?” etc). I did some math and if this were true she would’ve had to have been like 14 when she got engaged.
A month later I discover she told one of the managers (I dunno why she kept this herself for so long) that the new chick said “I won’t be happy until every man in this building wants to fuck me.”
Later I discover she isn’t engaged and never has been and her child is actually not hers but her sister’s.
Needless to say she is basically fucking insane and I wouldn’t touch her with a 10 foot pole.
10. Becoming super possessive of a guy in your life
Girl I worked with had a huge crush on me. She was really cool and fun, but she didn’t take good care of herself. I loved hanging out with her, but there was zero attraction.
She became possessive of me at work and out at the bars. She’d tell girls I hooked up with that I was hers and generally trying to intimidate them.
She walked in on me banging a coworker and freaked out…. Ran down the stairs and out the house in tears.
Had too many discussions with her before I finally had her fired for creating a toxic work environment.
11. Seriously, DON’T follow us places
On the first day of a new college semester a girl in my class ended up being in my next class and sat next to me. Didn’t think much of it. Never saw her in the second class again. A few weeks later she approached me and explained how she really liked me and had followed me and sat in on my class. Was a little flattered but mostly creeped out.
12. Sending weird messages without prompting
There was a girl on a forum I used to frequent that used to pm me about every day. I enjoyed talking to her for the longest time until the messages became a bit more … personal.
Then she sent me some pictures in various stages of undress and I told her to cut it out, which she luckily did, although she kept sending me weird messages about how special I was and how we were meant to be. I stopped reacting and the forum disappeared, so no longer have that to deal with.
13. Saying weird shit to us in public
A girl in high school straight up asked me, in a seductive tone, “You want to touch my titties?” This was in class, easily audible to others around us.
14. Staring at us
My ex-wife used to stare at me before we got together. Not the normal looking, the intense unblinking stare. Made my skin crawl for the first little while, then I began to ignore it.
15. Touching men inappropriately
A random girl on campus in an elevator alone with me, while recording for her Snapchat, grabbed my dick and giggled, “I finally got him!” It caught me really off guard as I was stressed about exams at the time.
Messed me for some time and made me more cautious of my surroundings.
16. Being sexual toward us on the subway
I was standing in a subway car in Korea, about 7 at night, listening to music and this chick was sitting across from me. The car was empty, she was talking on the phone and she started mouthing lots of sexual insinuations to me.
I was just minding my own business and I bet a lot of you are thinking, “wow I wish that would happen to me,” but she had this deranged look in her eye and she was kind of crazy looking.
She looks good enough and she was definitely making advances, but I kind of just ignored her because if some chick is that desperate in Korea then either she’s trying to scam me or she’s got some fucked up shit planned. My dad was a truck driver and he used to tell me stories of guys that would get picked up by women at the truck stops and basically murdered in the bathroom or robbed, that was in my mind when she was doing that.
17. Bombarding dudes on social media
I’m a lifeguard at a camp that runs year round and all these different camps come through and they usually stay about a week. I’m 18 and a lot of the campers and counselors are the same age as me so I meet a lot of people. One of the camps came through and this girl was being really flirty with me while I was lifeguarding (that’s not unusual) and I was just being nice to her as I always do.
She was pretty cool and we talked some throughout the week and after she left she followed me on Instagram which was the first weird thing because I never gave her my Instagram or my last name so I have no idea how she got it. She kept sending messages asking for my Snapchat and I gave in and gave it to her and she just kept bombarding me with messages that I would never reply to. I still get messages from her and that was like 5 months ago. I ended up dating her friend too completely coincidentally, I had no idea they knew each other
18. Trying to get us to cheat on our GF
She actively professed to wanting to steal me from my girlfriend by getting me to cheat with her. While not offering anything that I or anyone else I knew would or could want.
19. Texting us WAY too much
This one girl got my number and texted me everyday for a couple of weeks, saying “Hey” or “Hiiii” or some variation of it. I knew she liked me from previous flirting one way from her, but I never flirted back. She’s not attractive to me but her parents love me and they’re obsessed with me. I went to her graduation party over the summer when I had a girlfriend and creepy girl followed me everywhere. She even thanked me for showing up when she was giving a speech in front of everyone.
Easy to say creepiest girl I’ve ever had to talk to.
20. Weird touching
Girl I worked with for one night would periodically come to my register and cuddle up to me, feel me up, slap me in the face, grab my ass, and pinch my cheeks (face). She took my phone and added herself on kik so the next day when we didn’t work in the same stand, she texted me around quitting time and said ‘please don’t leave, I love you’.
21. Looking up where we work and showing up there
The dental assistant:
She looked up where I worked from the papers that you fill out with your contact info for the dentist’s office. She showed up at the bar I worked at and expected me to be thrilled, but confusion was all it could offer.
I never went back to that dentist office.
22. Not taking the hint that we aren’t interested
So one day I got a Facebook friend request. I didn’t recognize the person or her name, but we went to the same school and I have a shitty memory so maybe I’ve met her. I hadn’t, but I add her and she starts texting me. These texts got progressively weirder… From asking if she could be my sister (no thanks, I already have one too many), if I think she’s pretty, if we could be family, etc.
Again, I’ve never met this person. I try to nicely shut her down each time but she won’t leave me alone. A girl I was seeing at the time sent her a pretty blunt message on my behalf and even that didn’t stop her. Though it did stop her from texting me goodnight every day and sending pictures.
23. Complaining about your problems when we barely know you
This other chick I had the misfortune of ever interacting with, I initially contacted on Tumblr because I saw a post by her tagged with a political tag I was looking at and I was like, “Oh, this girl seems to know shit about the issue and also she’s pretty” so I messaged her and we talked for a bit and it was fine and normal.
After a little while though she started sending me messages all the time at like 3-4 am talking about how she was so fucked up and she hated herself because she was an alcoholic and general crazy shit like that. I was like “please stop sending me messages in the middle of the night when you are drunk” and she just kept doing it and anytime I tried to be supportive and shit she would just start rambling about how she couldn’t change because she was pathetic and she cut herself and shit and I was like “You need to get help, I am not qualified to give you this kind of advice.”
The last thing she ever said to me was some shit about how she was involved with some people who were in a gang and that I was in danger or some shit but she would protect me from them and I told her that I was so unbelievably uncomfortable with this and I can’t keep talking to her because she was fucking crazy. Blocked her and I try not to think about it.
24. Seriously, don’t touch us
Unwanted touching. If I haven’t given you any indication that I’m interested, don’t touch me. I’m not your property.
Last night I met a woman at a bar through mutual friends. As she was leaving she grabbed my hand and said in a what she thought was a sexy voice, “I’ll probably see you again.” She let go and trailed her fingers across my forearm as she walked off. I get it, you’re flirting and think I’m attractive. But the feeling is not mutual. Don’t touch me.
The random ass grabbing is also not cool.