I’m Over You And It Feels So Good To Say It (And Finally Mean It)

Bianca des Jardins
Bianca des Jardins

I see your name light up my phone and now I feel nothing. I feel no desire to open it immediately, I have no interest in trying to dissect your pretty little words, I have no smile unintentionally coming across my face anymore. I don’t stay up hoping you’ll get lonely and I don’t jump on my phone in the morning to see if you might have messaged me.

I have nothing; I feel nothing.

I am finally over you and it feels so good.

Now, I’m not the one who is waiting for your call. If a day goes by and I don’t hear from you I don’t even realize the growing silence. You stopped making appearances in all my dreams; apparently even my brain got sick of you and your bullshit.

It feels good to finally be the one in control.

I’m no longer the one who is sitting around waiting for your call; I’m no longer the one who is desperately hoping to hear from you. I’m not waiting for your compliments to ring in or get excited listening to you talk about how you want me.

I can look at you now and not feel nerves flood my body and get tongue-tied when you walk by. It doesn’t take every once of me not to blow up your phone. It doesn’t take all my will power to not walk right up to you and kiss you.

I can look at you with her now and it doesn’t make me sad, it doesn’t feel like my heart is being ripped out of my chest.

I can hear that you’re finally happy and it makes me feel good.

I can drive by your house and not feel a thing. I can listen to our old song on the radio and not feel obligated to change the station.

That’s what it feels like to finally be over you, to finally move on.

I still cry at sad songs, but not because they remind me of you.

I still look at my phone just as much, but thoughts of your name popping up don’t even cross my mind.

I still read love quotes, but not because they make me think of you.

I still sleep on one side of the bed, but not because I hope you’ll be knocking on my door and asking to have your side of the bed back.

I still do everything the same, but not because of you.

I’ve finally moved on, I’ve moved forward and everything I do now is because I’m happy on my own. That’s what moving on from you feels like and I’m glad I can finally mean it when I say it. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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