Alana Capri
Getting to the “heart” of the matter.
Zodiac Signs Ranked From Hardest Workers To Lazy AF
SAGITTARIUS: I’m going to write this pretending as if you’re reading it, but everyone knows you’re still asleep. For you, a busy day involves setting the alarm and then pressing the snooze button over and over.
Zodiac Signs Ranked From Most To Least Jealous
LEO: Your overblown ego prevents you from being jealous most of the time, because how could anybody want someone else after they’ve been with you? But underneath your confident lion’s veneer is an insecure, shivering little kitty.
Zodiac Signs Ranked From Hottest To Coldest, Based On How They Get Revenge
PISCES: When someone crosses you, they’d better make the sign of the cross, because they’ve just summoned the wrath of God. You will murder them if you can get away with it. Failing that, you’ll go for manslaughter.
This Is How You Get Angry, Based On Your Zodiac Sign
ARIES: You wail like a bawling infant, throw your milk bottle to the floor in a rage, but then you’ll calm down as soon as the ice cream arrives.
This Is How You Handle Breakups, Based On Your Zodiac Sign
CANCER: You swear off of love forever. You say “love” is a stupid idea. You learn to hate the idea of love. And it’s all because you still love him.
This Is How You Feel When You’re Falling Deeply In Love, Based On Your Zodiac Sign
ARIES: As long as he is holding your hand, you would jump into the ocean with him. Take a rocket to Mars with him. Walk through a tornado with him. Walk across hot coals with him. You’d do everything except walk away from him.
Zodiac Signs Ranked From Most Psychic To Totally Clueless
GEMINI: Leave it to the Twins to always do things halfway—when it comes to psychic ability, you’re somewhere between Miss Cleo and a mortar brick.
Your Biggest Turn-On (In One Word), Based On Your Zodiac Sign
AQUARIUS: Mystery.