The Breast Is Best Enthusiast
Being fiscally responsible is a practice—like playing a musical instrument or doing yoga (sort of)
When you realize that you’re not perfectly aligned in every single way and you know that that’s okay but you also kind of secretly wish it weren’t that way.
“I can’t lie. I had a reallllly hard time during pregnancy watching my weight tick up and up and up nonstop…”
“The way I see it, we all have two choices in life: sit back and watch life happen, or make life happen.”
“My wife’s body is so different lately, it’s like fucking a whole new person. I’m so into it.”
Around the corner from every trying moment is a wonderfully reassuring punch, kick, or head butt from that tiny little human growing inside you.
Don’t get me wrong: I am delighted by the prospect of bringing a new life into the world. I expect to make endless compromises as I adjust to the life-changing milestone that is parenthood. But I refuse to become entirely selfless as I embark on this whole motherhood journey.
Why do the dirty work of breaking up if you can make your significant other do it for you?
The 18th century’s most successful harlots were fiercely competitive.