How To Tell If Somebody Loves You

i liked the naive optimism of the last two lines. wish it was true

I love this, Ryan. So so true. It’s wonderful when you finally realize that one of your friendships has blossomed into something like you described :)

FML….i knew it wasnt real love, fuck her and fuck u too

naive? far from it.

your mom will always love you <3 that's what I thought of when I read the last lines :D

Loved this. A nice deviation from your recent posts. I loved the warm, fuzzy feelings I got while reading :]

So what if that person did everything on this list, even moved to another state to be with you after a year and a half of long-distance, but still walked away for no reason, and now is “with” someone who lives 2 hours away? Is that still real love?

shit, that’s deep shit

Somebody loves you if they’ll drive 8 hours with you to the middle of nowhere so you can be reunited with your childhood dog.

Insanity. 

Somebody loves you if she hides your keys and then watches you run around wildly looking for them while she  giggles.

come on, not EVERYONE in the world is loved like this. 

 (oh, unless you’re thinking of like, “God” or something.

im not sure if you’re just a good person ryan, or if you’ve had depressed friends and are especially sensitive to the needs of people who are down in the dumps, but i feel like with almost every post…there’s always something hopeful, and not just lala life is fun, but hopeful for depressed people…which is pretty damn powerful.  Kind of like here’s my really good post, it’s funny and well written, but oh just in case you’re depressed and feel like life isnt worth living…here’s something to bring you back off the ledge and remind you that life can be good and even though i dont know you, you probably are great.

good job making people feel better about themselves, good job being a good person.
(this got really serious, real fast)

that person loved you then, it seems

I’m using this at my wedding. I’m not asking. I’m telling. And I’m keeping the oral sex part. Suck that, Grandma!

The last two lines are mushy and false. What about the homeless man on my block who scares people into giving him money by showing him the growth on his abdomen? No one loves that man ALWAYS.

yes yes yes yes yes

This is exactly what I needed to read today. You rule, Ryan O’Conn.

The paragraph about not minding the quiet is both well written and beautifully accurate. 

great work ryan

Oh please, your mom’s (hopefully) not going to give you oral sex.

Somebody loves you if she takes the time to comment on your post about how much it sings to her. 

The paragraph about calling someone out on his bullshit/busting his balls is so accurate and so poignant and goddamn I wish my friends understood this.  It all comes back to love.

I love you, Ryan. :)

Somebody must kill me for reading this

We all need the same things, yet somehow it all gets so complicated.

I still have hope.

I don’t think you should be faking food poisoning to test someone’s love. Kind of a dick move.

This is beautiful. I got a little teary eyed. I completely agree. I saw this in myself, and I saw this in people in my life. Anyone who has this is lucky. One of my favorite articles, thank you so much. <3

Ahhh jeez, Ryan, my boyfriend’s in Europe for the next two-and-a-half weeks and I miss that kid so fucking much and you just dropped like a tear bomb on my heart, man, because we do more than half of this with each other all the time, and I can’t even contact him. Why must you know how to hit me right in my poor youthful girl-heart, Ryan?!

Wonderful work, but now I’m gonna have to go cry for a while. That got me good. 

i really like the last sentence.

At sometime, somewhere, I’m sure somebody did.

It must be “person I care about has fucked off to Europe and I’m so tragically alone in my bed” month. 

“Somebody will always love you. If you don’t think this is true, then you’re not paying close enough attention.” ~~ouch! did this just hit me like a fire truck? I think it just did.

Why does this happen? Who will explain that? Just selfishness? Man, so hopeless. :(

There’s a lot of truth in this text.  Love to find a girl who could offer all of that!

you just reaffirmed my belief in my relationship yay!

Best comment I’ve ever read on TC, sincerely.

and

I’m not one of those “OMG Ryan O’Connell please be my best friend” people that seem to pepper every comments section of every article you write, Ryan, because I don’ t usually find your articles that engaging. This one, however, hit me ‘like a ton of bricks’. By which I mean…wow.

So according to this list, I still love my ex-boyfriend, and he never loved me. Seems accurate.

You can love someone and still not want to spend your life with them. Sometimes loving someone involves letting them go and find happiness with someone else. I don’t know your exact situation but sometimes leaving can be the most loving thing you can do in the situation.

I’m sorry your heart has been broken. I hope you won’t let it keep you from falling in love all over again. Unfortunately it seems you have to risk being hurt when you open your heart to love. I’ve personally been trying to find a way around that for years. But I was only led to accepting that fact.

Hey, you too. Haha

This is exactly what I needed to read today too.

Well, all July has going for it is being National Blueberry Month, so that seems like a catchy replacement title.

maybe his mom

If Cosmo and Eat,Pray,Love had a night of cuddling and spontaneously procreated-

I believe it would look a bit like this.

somebody loves you if he switches route so that he could walk next to you longer even though both of you arent talking. 

Actually there are tons of ways to expect your love one. Just keep it simple and everything would be alright.

It actually is! 

Hell, I’m the one who fucked off to Europe and I still find myself tragically alone in my bed.

Trust me, the only foolproof way to determine if somebody loves you is if they will help you move.

When someone loves you he or she is not too afraid to ask. One does not just assume a person would like this or that like this post seems to do. I´ll take a person who can speak over a mime any day of the week.

And caving in to someones pleas for attention when sick and then saying people should call those that they love out on their bullshit goes in contrast to each other. Those who demand attention when they’re down thinking they deserve it don’t show enough care to their mate to deserve the same attention back.

Somebody loves you if they can be patient. If they can work with you and your schedule until you can truly be together. Somebody also loves you when they demand the best. When the push you to your limits, but you don’t mind, nor argue, because you only want them to have the best of you.

Yeah, that was going well until you mentioned oral sex. I’m not sure that always means love; the other person could just be really horny or thought you might reciprocate but didn’t, so they played it off. Why can’t people talk about love without having to talk about sex???

Either love me with vomit in my hair or don’t love me at all.

Would you love Jesus with vomit in his hair?

its sad if you don’t believe that everyone is loved by someone. i feel sorry for you.

Because intimate are really important when it comes to romantic love relationships. If you don’t enjoy being that intimate with someone, then something is wrong. Sex is important, it’s not a bad thing.

You can be intimate without going all the way or giving oral.

But you have to understand that sex is a beautiful thing and an incredible gesture of love. Society nowadays has such a skewed view of it, always telling kids and teens that sex is bad, that you’ll get all kinds of STI’s and YOU’LL BECOME PREGNANT. But sex is more than just pregnancy waiting to happen. It’s truly incredible when it’s with someone you love.

As an asexual, I disagree.

somebody loves you that will stroke your head while you take a difficult dump.

im gonna go eat worms

i love this

My boyfriend does all of these things, and he genuinely cares about me, but has made it very clear that he does not love me. It’s hard to accept, but the fact that he treats me in a loving way still makes me feel special. Love is relative to each person, what I consider love to be is obviously not the same thing that my boyfriend considers love to be. This is a lovely article but I am not going to just believe someone loves me because they do a list of things. And before anyone says I am being too negative and he may be scared to admit his true feelings, he did say he loved me once, and then retracted it later on because he felt so bad for lying to me just to make me feel better.

Hm, having God lick a napkin and wipe the mustard off your face.  That’s an interesting thought. :)

i genuinely enjoyed this article

…You say this as though not having sex means you don’t understand it. One can realize “sex is a beautiful thing and an incredible gesture of love”, but some people don’t need it in their relationship in order to feel that love. “Need” being the key word. Just because someone wants to wait or is “asexual” doesn’t mean somethings wrong with the relationship.

I agree that I was a tad thrown off by the sudden jump into physical aspects of the relationship, but I don’t really agree with the idea that people can’t talk about love without talking about sex. It’s simply an example that made a point. Most people choose to have relations, and if you’re in an immature relationship it’s often that you have someone who minds that you don’t return the favor. Their point was simply that it’s true love if the person can give you something and not expect it in return. This article was probably geared towards people who don’t share the same views as you and me, but the point was valid. 

This article confirmed what I already knew, that my boyfriend loved me…but it made me question if I really love him.

***loves

Some people don’t need it and for some people it is just nice additional thing. As it seems to be for writer of this text and he seems to be okay with that fact. After all he just mentioned it as one of nice things you can do. I didn’t complain that he told about watching movie of Katie Hudson even I don’t  do that kind of thing. :)

What?!

What?!

What?!

This beautifully captures the different types of love there are :)

This just made me rethink my nearly four-year long-distance relationship. And to think I’m planning to move to his country to be with him. It makes me wonder what will happen if I make the move, will all the things listed here hold true?

Your nearly 4 year long distance relationship is an inspiration to me, I’m in one as well and I miss him deeply.

Btw this post just made me love him more.

My best friend does all these things. 

hmmmmm this was interesting!!

no offense but do you watch Hindi (indian) movies??? coz everything u said is something that we have been watching in movies since start of the Movie era…. except the part of blowjob thingy… :p

and i do believe in stuffs u said…

This defines my best friend. I love you. 

no.

What about when you love someone, This seems incredibly one sided.

It’s written one-sidedly. But if you read it right in your mind, this is also an assessment of if you give acts of love to someone else.

Sickening and sappy and unrelated to real love–just some silly, Hollywood romantic pseudo-version of love.  

I’m also in a long distance relationship, although not in two seperate countries. We only live 2 hours away from each other and I miss him so much, but the distance makes me love him even more. Seeing your comment though has made mine seem so much easier, and I know that if you can do it for four years being a world away from each other, then surely I can make the 2 hour trek. Thank you :)

No offense but the article seems to be a narrow minded approach to defining love. It cannot be defined by a list of things you do for a person. It is something a lot more powerful than you think it is. I really don’t know how to put it in words.

No offense but the article seems to be a narrow minded approach to defining love. It cannot be defined by a list of things you do for a person. It is something a lot more powerful than you think it is. I really don’t know how to put it in words.

No offense but the article seems to be a narrow minded approach to defining love. It cannot be defined by a list of things you do for a person. It is something a lot more powerful than you think it is. I really don’t know how to put it in words.

But what about when you love them? This was so half-way there, oh so they love you and do all this stuff but how do you feel and act back? Do you just let them pour themselves into you? It seems so selfish

Anyone who thinks this is one sided or a fake kind of love has got to understand love is unconditional and that means it is not required that the actions described be reciprocated. And what was written in this blog is not saying that only the stated actions can prove ones love but IT is the idea behind the action, each example shows the many facets of love that can be shown to/by more than just a spouse. The examples can exist with anyone in your life, and the idea behind all of this is that if you and another mesh like clockwork and everything seems effortless and you like being around those people without any unwanted feelings or doubt then how can you not love someone like that?

I believe this is true. Granted there is stuff about sex in there, but you can have this sort of love for a best friend. I have found two people in my life that i share everyone of these things with. I love one of them in a platonic best friend way and the other in a romantic best friend way.

does your best friend give you oral sex too?

faggots

well, the author tried at least.. 

we’d like to hear your version

it would seem it applies to both sides. just take a look at it from the other side.

maybe thats why its their “best” friend

Jesus is not real. i would AMy Winehouse

to a point. that can only get you so far. you have to go oral

nah, its bail you out. at 2am.

this was a good article. i dont need a digest to read about love first thing in the morning, i got a shitload to read.
so this was nice. 

Hey Dear, I am Jasmin Betts, mature and good figure girl. I just want to say that you have create wonderful post. Thank you for sharing your priceless post. I am a member of big adult dating community which have 800 single girls, women and men members. This is easy way to meet your darling partner. So just join me for free annual membership and be more and more enjoyable your night with your desirable partner at …

http://www.adultxdating.eu

My boyfriend/best friend is moving in 2 weeks and I’m stressing over 3 hours of separation. You have no idea how much hope you have just given me 

Haha, my boyfriend did the exact same thing in this time period.

Its not an article about how to love someone. Duh. Its not selfish at all.

I’m sorry that you haven’t found someone who can love you or be loved by you like this. Obviously there are less glamorous aspects to love but that’s not what this article was about. if you want to be a cynic and disregard the fact that this kind of love DOES exist, I feel bad for you, because you’ll never find it if you don’t believe in it.

I agree this is stupid!!

mc + sm <3

mc + sm <3

Someone and I were just like this. Then he dumped me. I loved him, but I guess even when you fit all the criteria, a little something might still be missing.

I wish the last part was true

this is one of my favorite thought catalog articles. i just came across it on stumble upon and it made my day :)

Asking someone to bring you some water and soup when you’re sick is not crying out for attention, it’s genuinely needing help to feel better. I love being there for my best friend when he’s sick or upset, but at the same time if I’m feeling reallly under the weather I might be inclined to ask him to go to the store to get me soup or some movies.. because we’re comfortable enough with each other to admit that we could use a hand. 
That’s another thing that I feel was left out, if they’re comfortable enough to ask you for help or to cry in front of you when something has upset them, they love you. Hiding feelings and fears and doubts from your best friend shows a lack of trust and without trust and communication, a relationship of any kind will fail.Calling someone out on their bullshit isn’t exactly the opposite of helping someone when they’re sick either. If you’re being a total idiot about something, taking something the wrong way or just plain over reacting, a good friend/partner will tell you you’re being an idiot.. but if you come down with a terrible flu the next day they’re just as likely to want to make sure you’re healthy and feeling better as soon as possible because they don’t like seeing you in pain.

And for everyone complaining that you shouldn’t judge your love life off a list on the internet… you need to come to terms with the fact that things like this are just a brief thought from a person. They are an opinion. To be honest I agree wholeheartedly with this “list”. Yes, there are shit parts of love, you aren’t ALWAYS going to be doing all of these things… but they should be present more often than not. It might not even be these things specifically; you may, as a couple, have special ways of showing your affection, not all relationships fit the social “norm” of romantic love, but you can probably relate your individual quirks to some of those in the article.Besides, it’s an internet article, not to be taken as law :)

I’m hooked from the first line of this brilliant piece…picking an eyelash off someones face is such an innocent and pure gesture

yeah you are missing the point if they love you be willing to reciprocate and be friends advancing with caution because so many have been hurt by foolish actions

This is simply another trite version of those “Love Is” cartoons they used to (or god forbid still do) post in the newspaper. Or maybe Jeanne Teasdale from The Onion wrote it. All this tripe demonstrates that the person who posted it is someone who a. is being used by someone for money, company,etc. b. a “grown up” who still sleeps with her old Pooh bear and practices making out with him, c.posts this nonsense  or something similar every time she’s found “the one”, d. a MAJOR virgin, e. all of thee above.
Sorry to be the cynic, but when you find Chicks with Dicks porn on your computer and your jaundiced baby has managed to urp on your face AND favorite stretch pants, we’ll see who’s wiping congealed breast milk from whose fallen eyelash.
And no, this hasn’t happened to me because I do not measure love to something that could be found in a middle school yearbook.

I started crying while reading this because it made me realize that the man I love and live with does not truly love me.  

I believe the last statement about someone will always love is so very true, whether you know it or not….

only an idiot would allow an internet posting to define their relationship

Yay, someone loves me :D

like omg I can totally tell he likes me he touches me all the time!

I’m a lucky girl :)

Wow, I’m in relief:) fucking lucky I have true love!

Ryan, you repeat yourself, but that’s what’s so lovely about you. Haha, esp bout the holding hair while you vomit thing 

how can you tell if some loves you.
they never look away frome you and they just look at you with love even though you ignore it.
they say random things and say grate things about you or to you. Talk to there friend and ask them if they like you or love you. Easy way in. You can tell when they truly love you when they just about never stop trying to look in to your eyes and once that happons they try to say i love you and I wish you knew it and hear that I am saying this in my minde.
I have my true love man I am happy that I got such a grate women.

      Your compleatly right all most. Or you are compleatly right its true that love is like that but when you can tell you love them is when for some odd reason you can’t stop thinking of that one person every day and nite and you just think of being with her or him for ever or something for some odd reason but people also begin to dout when thoughs thots pop up for some odd reason. But some people don’t have that happon to them its something difrent. They think of them about all most evere day but they are un sher until they finde out the truth if they really do love them or not so they check by seeing how they feel around that person a gen and a gen. At times and if they don’t feel ene feelings for the person then they usealy go on. but if they do have feelings then they try to finde out if they have the same but they are don’t want to mess it up or they know that they like him or her.
Its just a sicle of love and broken harts at points. but i know that love is real because I am in a relation ship.
Male not female and not gay im sorry to say but if there are ene on hear I don’t like homo sexuality one bit it makes me sick.

Well, I figure somethings not completely right if guest number one here finds something wrong he/she needs to communicate more with her partner.
It doesn’t mean they aren’t in love but something is wrong, you need to talk.

at last i can tell the world that he loves me since he proposed to me.

I happen to really appreciate the author of this article. I absolutely love the message the article sends. Before I read this, I was fairly sure I was in love with my partner, and I mostly believed him when he told me he loved me. Now, I’m 99% positive that I love him and he loves me back. I never dreamed that I would find The One while I was still in high school, but I think I might have. And I’m only an 18 tear old girl! I’m probably the luckiest person out there to have found him.

I totally agree

people fancy u really when they always stare and smile at u. They never really talk 2 u though n try 2 avoid u also try 2 mmake an impression so they can let u know that they fancy u. Sometimes can get into a fight and try 2 win so it luks like ur really strong n can take up a fight, mostly are very popular n hang out in a gang with big boys or from the same or smaller year. Hpe this helps cause thats wat happened 2 me   I KNOW RIGHT!?

I am so thankful that SUN RISE SPELL is GOOD to me. I am old enough now to look back over my life and see where He has brought me from. I see His hand on my life the whole way. How I love Him! I am thankful for his SPELL CASTING. I am thankful for His abiding presence. I am thankful for His patience with me as I am growing. I am thankful, oh so thankful, that he brought my lovely girl back to me which is my precious love. I am thankful for the joy that He’s brought into my life: my wife, my beautiful children, my home. He is precious and good and altogether lovely. Oh bless His name! sunrisespell@gmail.com” Alissa cares….

I think you’re in a cult

Wow…with respect to a certain-someone in my life, going by this article I’m SOL. Maybe that’s why her email responses to my initial offering of at least a paragraph was always a single run-on sentence with nearly all the words misspelled.  In hindsight, I  guess you could say she had no intention of  giving me anything real or ever wanting it to be “right”…

Just broke up from my longest relationship a few days ago, still searching for answers. I love him and was wanting him to be in love with me, but I can see from this that he didn’t exhibit most of these qualities, it provides a little reassurance… of course the things listed above are not the catch-all of love, but I would say they are pretty spot on towards how I feel about him. Anyway, best to take some time to heal and try to find true love someday with someone who loves me back than stay in a relationship where you’re constantly wondering why they feel distant and won’t step up for you.

I couldn’t wait to update you on what has happened. I requested the absolute good luck money spell be cast only last Thursday. Over the weekend I found $100.00 laying on the ground outside my apartment, purchased a lotto ticket and won $10,000 from that and won a new car from a sweepstakes! To top it off, I went into work on Monday and got the promotion I had been wanting! I could not believe how fast your spells work. I will certainly recommend POWERFUL KUMAR Spells to any of my friends.thanks powerful kumar(powerfulkumarspell@yahoo.com)