Zodiacs Ranked From Who You Take Home To Mom To Who You Text After Midnight For A Good Lay

topless girl
God & Man

Cancer

Cancers are the epitome of who every mother wants their child to procreate with. They are sweet and caring and basically everyone wants to hug them. They give great advice and are just overall wholesome, good people.

Libra

Libras really just want everyone to get along. They don’t cause drama, they hate arguing, and they’ll charm the pants off of your mother. They’re as smart as they are kind, and parents always love them.

Capricorn

Family is extremely important to Capricorns. They are all about traditions and will totally embrace whatever weird rituals your family may have. They’re the type of people to treat your mother like she’s their own mother. They’ll call her every week just to say hello, and ask her for her famous chocolate chip cookie recipe when they’re in the mood to bake.

Taurus

Tauruses are extremely grounded and always level-headed. Any mother can appreciate a Taurus’s practicality. Tauruses are also really good at making people feel comfortable, so your mother won’t have a worry in the world when you bring this person around.

Virgo

Virgos are extremely careful and always think before they speak. They might not be the most confident of the zodiac, so their first impression isn’t captivating, but they try really hard to be liked, so they’re a good person to take home to mom. You’re definitely better off taking a Virgo home to mom than sleeping with one for just one night because they’re inclination towards second guessing makes them extremely vanilla in the bedroom.

Aquarius

The Aquarius is an intellectual. They want to have deep conversations, and will most likely ask your mother about her religious beliefs at the dinner table, which could get a little awkward for you. They won’t change themselves to make your mother (or anyone) like them. They will be their authentic self and expect the same from anyone else they let into their life.

Gemini

Geminis are iffy to take home to mom because you never know which side of their personality you’re going to get. It basically depends on the day, and all you can do is keep your fingers crossed and hope your mother meets the angelic side of them, and not the devilish one. They fall in the middle of the spectrum between a goody two-shoes and a good one night stand because they’re not crazy adventurous in bed, and whether or not you’re mother will like them is 50/50.

Leo

Taking home a Leo to mom is touchy because drama seems to follow them wherever they go. They also like to talk about themselves a lot, which is great if your mother wants to know who they are, but she might also interpret their ego-centrism as downright rudeness or arrogance. A Leo is probably better to hit up after midnight for a good lay because they’re confident enough to boss you around in the bedroom, or wherever else they’d like to have sex with you.

Scorpio

Scorpios are a little aggressive to bring home to Mom. They’re super resourceful so you might have more fun with them in bed than at your mother’s dining room table. They’re the type to make sex fun, they’ll have a fully stocked sex drawer with all kinds of good toys, and they won’t stop until you’re BOTH finished.

Sagittarius

A Sagittarius is full of curiosity. They’re generous and funny, but your mother probably won’t like their lack of direction. They’re wanderers, and they love their freedom. Their generosity is better suited for sex than it is for anything else.

Pisces

Pisces are artists. They usually don’t believe in working 9 to 5 jobs that are meaningless and believe everyone should actively pursue their dreams no matter how far-fetched. Your mom isn’t going to like the fact that they’d rather have a dream than a yearly salary with health benefits. Pisces are romantics, so they’re going to be super passionate in the bedroom and they’d rather give you pleasure than experience it for themselves.

Aries

Aries is a fire sign so you can count on them to bring the heat in the bedroom. They’re energetic, confident, and extremely adventurous. Your mother might not particularly like them, but your libido will. They’re the best zodiac sign to hit up after midnight for a good lay because they’re usually down for anything, especially sex. TC mark

Nicole Tarkoff

Writer based in the Philadelphia area. Person who really loves her dog and watching cooking shows. Check out my writing on Thought Catalog and follow me on Facebook! Connect with me and submit your work on Collective World.

This is me letting you go

If there’s one thing we all need to stop doing, it’s waiting around for someone else to show up and change our lives. Just be the person you’ve been waiting for.

At the end of the day, you have two choices in love – one is to accept someone just as they are and the other is to walk away.

We owe it to ourselves to live the greatest life that we’re capable of living, even if that means that we have to be alone for a very long time.

“Everyone could use a book like this at some point in their life.” – Heather

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