(March 21st to April 19th)
You don’t sugarcoat. You give your SO the honest reason you’re dumping them no matter how brutal or ridiculous that reason may be. You’re the type of person who has no problem dumping someone in person. You think it’s painfully lame to dump someone over text or email. You’re going to ask them to meet you somewhere, tell them what’s up, probably wish them the best in all of their future endeavors and be on your way.
(April 20th to May 21st)
You rarely ever dump people because it takes long enough for you to start a relationship in the first place. If you are going to dump someone, you try to beat them to the punch. You’re always worried that anyone you start to like will leave you, so you look for reasons to lose interest in them before they lose interest in you. When you dump someone it’s like a race, and you’re not about to come in second.
(May 22nd to June 21st)
You dump someone on Monday and by Wednesday, you’re already second guessing whether you made the right decision. You’re the ex that reaches out after 5 days of being broken up, looking to rekindle. You’re that ex that everyone hates and when it comes to dumping people you’re always back and forth.
(June 22nd to July 22nd)
You are terrible at dumping people because it hurts you to hurt someone else. You’re extremely sensitive to other people’s feelings, and you never know how to end the relationship so that nobody gets hurt. When you finally collect enough courage to let them go, you’re not reaching out the next week to get back together, you’re sincerely reaching out to make sure they’re okay.
(July 23rd to August 22nd)
You’re kind of a jerk when it comes to dumping people, and you openly admit it. You think about how to move on with your own life after the breakup, not about nursing their heartbreak and whether or not their life has fallen apart since. You don’t feel terrible if they start to cry while you’re in the middle of saying you no longer want to be with them anymore, you know they’ll eventually get over it.
(August 23rd to September 22nd)
You put a lot of thought into the break up before you go through with it, and you thoroughly think about how you’ll clean up the mess it leaves afterwards. You basically write out a script of why you’re ending the relationship and rehearse it when you’re alone. It practically kills you that you won’t know their reaction until you actually do the dumping, but you prepare a course of action for every possibility.
(September 23rd to October 22nd)
After you dump someone, they’re never quite sure if you actually dumped them or not. You are allergic to confrontation so you try to phrase the breakup as nicely as possible, but sometimes it just sounds like you’re complimenting them. “You are beautiful and intelligent, and I think you’ll make a wonderful partner…” and then you leave out the part about “for someone else” because you’re terrified of the sad look that will suddenly appear on their face after you do it.
(October 23rd to November 22nd)
You’re the tough love type. You are 100% honest when dumping someone because you think honesty will hurt them less than completely bullshitting them, and you don’t bullshit anyone. You tell them the real reason you’re ending it, and you don’t feel the need to apologize. You know you shouldn’t have to feel sorry for recognizing that you deserve better.
(November 23rd to December 21st)
You dump someone and leave the country, and sometimes you use leaving the country as an excuse. You’re not trying to escape the relationship or the breakup, you just never feel yourself when you’re standing still. You’re always on the move.
(December 22nd to January 20th)
You have dump day in your Google Calendar. You know exactly when and where you’re going to dump someone because you plan to, and you’re confident in your decision. You end your relationships like you’re ending a business meeting. You’re professional, and so are your breakups.
(January 21st to February 18th)
You push emotions to the side when you dump someone. You’d rather keep your feelings in than let them out and you don’t know how to react when people do the opposite. When you dump someone you like to be single for an extended period of time after. You need to live your life for you, and you’re not afraid to be alone while doing it.
(February 19th to March 20th)
You dump someone with hopes that you can still be friends, and you genuinely believe you can be. You just want everyone to be happy, but you don’t think about how it could hurt them to be just your friend. Sometimes you need to learn how to let them let you go. Friendship won’t make the breakup any less painful.