1. When you went from planning and being decisive, to being flaky, indecisive and incapable of making up your mind. Even if it was just a small lapse, if it lasted long enough it sends mixed messages and she’ll be done with you before you have a chance to come back from it.
2. Asking straight out if you’re going to have sex three minutes into the hook up. There’s no better way to kill a great first night together than jumping the gun and asking if you’re going to get laid.
3. When you’re flirting with her at a party, it’s going really well, and then it becomes clear that you’re speaking directly to her boobs as you get progressively more inebriated.
4. Anytime you invite yourself up to her apartment. If she wants you to come in, she’ll say so.
5. If you decline her invitation up to her apartment the wrong way. There are tactful ways to say, “I want to slow down” or “I really do have an early morning,” but choose your words wisely.
6. Revealing way too much information the first few times you see each other. If you talk about your family and growing up, she starts to like you. If you get really intense about the kind of family you want to have? Too much. She doesn’t need to know you want three kids right away.
7. Triple texting:
“Hey! I had a great time last night.”
“Hey, just wanted to make sure you got home safely. Would love to do it again sometime.”
“So like I don’t want to come off stalkerish or anything, but I just wanted to check in. Text me back when you have a sec.”
Nope. You lost’ve her. Never invite the stalker comparison. It won’t do you any favors.
8. If you get jealous early on and are noticeably uncomfortable with her male friends. It doesn’t say much if you can’t handle the woman you’re interested in having friends of the opposite sex.
9. Any time you tried so hard you ended up behaving like a complete asshole. If you’re great around everyone else and then awful around the lovely girl you might be going home with, all it says is that you’re insecure.
10. When you let yourself get friend zoned. You’re essentially copping out rather than making your feelings known. Being pushy isn’t okay, but being so passive that you let the opportunity pass is a turn off too.
11. Having weird posters or too many completely ridiculous hobbies. I really do believe that there’s a person out there that will appreciate your weird, out there quirks. But if you’re 27 and you’re not getting laid, it’s a surefire sign that you need to take down your Metallica poster. Now.
12. Proposing a group hang out for a first date. You started off strong, because she wanted to go out with you. And then you suggested she stop by a bar with all of your friends, instead of proposing that the two of you have drinks. It’s sending her a signal that says you don’t want to be alone with her, which is when she’ll lose interest.
13. Being anything but insanely respectful if your date drinks too much.
14. Revealing the incredibly immature ways you handled your last break-up. Why would you get in your own way like that?
15. Giving her the third degree. It’s one thing to take an interest and ask your date questions. It’s another thing to get so nervous that you’re just firing off questions for lack of anything better to say.
16. Three-minute sex. If you know you’re going to be that quick, use foreplay to your advantage instead of blatantly revealing that all sexual encounters with you are going to be unsatisfying and will move at the speed of a fast forwarded movie.
17. Revealing you actually hate the shared interest that brought the two of you together. If you met at a bible study, it’s not going to bode well if on the second date you casually mention you’re atheist.
18. Going abroad for a year. I mean, it’s not your fault but can you blame her for being less interested if you’re moving to a foreign country in a month?
19. Voicing your distaste for giving oral sex. … Bye.
20. Being overly greedy about oral sex.
21. Checking her phone, or pulling a quick look over her shoulder to see who she’s texting. You’re walking the fine line between “he has no game, but it’s cute!” and desperation.
22. Obnoxiously trying to get out of wearing a condom. There’s nothing less sexy than a guy who supposedly likes you having a blatant disregard for your sexual health.