1. You’re just ordering this because you heard it in a rap song, aren’t you?
I find that people who aren’t “real” drinkers order drinks that they’ve heard in rap songs. When Drake said something about Moscato, which is a sweet white wine, I suddenly had an influx of tough looking dudes ordering Moscato. I give them the drink and they look at me like, WTF, I’m like that’s what your dumb ass ordered!
2. Dayum, girl.
Long Island Iced Tea: I want to get fucked up.
3. You’re probably going to jail if you drink a lot of this.
As someone that formerly worked at the DA’s office, it seems like all crimes start with Bud Light. Not miller, not coors, not tequila, not whisky, not malt liquor…..Bud Light…from vehicular manslaughter to 1st degree murder…..Bud Light
4. Yo, it’s time for you to go home maybe?
I help out at a quiet English country pub, when someone orders a shot of anything it means they needed a taxi 2 drinks ago.