19. Had A Decent Job And Kept The Baby
I got pregnant in my mid 20s by a guy I would occasionally go get drinks/sleep with. I decided to keep the baby because even though I’m pro choice, I wanted kids and had a decent job and it didn’t bother me to be a single parent because my mom raised my brother and I mostly alone after booting my alcoholic dad out of the house.
A couple of close friends knew who the father was but I didn’t tell my family until later. Also I had the positive pregnancy test around 5 weeks, went to my first ultrasound and discovered I was actually having twins at almost ten weeks and I was like “ahhhhhhhhh!” So baby turned to babies, but it’s been the best thing and most challenging thing I’ve done with my life. My boys are 6 and I can’t imagine not having them.
Their father has seen them probably less than a dozen times in their life. I tried. I would take them to visit when he was home. But he got more into drugs and partying and being a shitty person and he’s currently on year two of a five year prison sentence for meth manufacturing. My kids are at the age where they notice they don’t have a dad. I told them he’s…traveling. I wrote him my first letter last week and put in some pictures they drew for him. Haven’t heard back yet.
Are people judgy? Sometimes. I feel like my family is especially hard on me because I made this choice. I work and spend 98% of my time off with my kids, my mom will rarely keep them for anything besides when I have a doctor’s appointment. I live in a small area and haven’t really been able to find any reliable sitters aside from their after school care so I don’t date or do anything for myself. I get a haircut like once a year, usually at the Wal-Mart while I grocery shop, and I used to spend half a day in the salon getting foil highlights every few months haha.
But all in all, definitely worth it. Would do it all over again, even those first few months with two babies when I went back to work at 6 weeks and was insane from sleep deprivation. They are my mini best friends.
20. Didn’t Even Know For Four Months
I was 19 and casually dating this guy. Partying, hanging out etc. One drunken night at a party, we had unprotected sex and I got pregnant. I know the exact day because it was the one time no protection was used. However, I didn’t know I was pregnant until I was 4 months along. I had no symptoms. Missing periods was normal for me (eating disorder had disrupted it). When I found out, I was originally going to have a family friend adopt it. They were never able to get pregnant and said they would take the baby. But, I changed my mind. I blame the hormones for my change of heart. The dad moved back to my hometown with me (where my mom is and rent is much cheaper) and we have been co parenting for the last 10 years. Definitely had our ups and downs, but he has been a good dad to her and even though we aren’t together, we do well with parenting. No one has been “judgy” and it’s been fairly easy. I didn’t have friends to tell about the pregnancy and just told my mom. She said she knew I would get pregnant because she did about the same age and so did her mom, lol.