8. Casual Thing Ends With Pregnancy
I found out I was pregnant after we’d ended our casual thing and I decided to keep the baby. I told the father and gave him the choice of being involved or relinquishing all rights (including being named on the birth certificate, so I wouldn’t pursue child support). He chose to be involved and he was a great support while I was pregnant, really taking an active role as a birth partner and parent.
I was always really clear that I’d be open to exploring a relationship, but I didn’t want to force anything. I think it’s disingenuous and harmful to get married or stay together for the kids, because that just means they’re going to live with miserable adults who can’t adequately demonstrate love. So while we explored things during the pregnancy and a little after, we realized that it just wasn’t going to work out and we were better off friends.
We did have a rough patch when we were dating partners who didn’t respect the role and boundaries of the other parent (his ex just wanted to play house and push me out of the picture; after they broke up, she met a guy and got pregnant within 3 months by a guy who already had 2 kids and was married before she gave birth, just to give you an idea of what she had in mind). During that time, we ended up switching to parallel parenting, but after our breakups, it was like we came out of a fog and realized that being on the same page was going to be paramount for our son’s growth and happiness.
We’ve now developed a really strong coparenting relationships and he’s honestly a very dear friend now. Our partners are respectful of where they stand in our and our child’s lives, and I’m pretty proud that we’ve managed to create a strong village for our boy.
9. Woman In Her Thirties Gets Pregnant, Finds Love
My mum was knocked up on the third date while camping. She was 32 and decided to keep the baby, even though her partner wasn’t interested in a relationship and just wanted to party. They stayed in contact and became friends, and when I was one, he moved in with us, and they fell in love.
They’re still together 30 years later, and adore each other. My dad started writing poetry to her when she was traveling for 6 weeks. You never know!