Stop Looking For Happiness In Other People

Julia Caesar

I know you think that that boy will fix you. Or that the girl you have loved for years will make your life good again, but I’m afraid that’s not how life works.

I know you think he is going to change everything. Or that she is the one thing that is going to make a difference. You think this one person holds the power to your happiness. You think this one person and this one relationship is the thing that is finally going to make you content with your life. Happy, even. 

Maybe this person will make you high for a bit. Maybe they will make you forget about your problems and issues and pain. Maybe for some time, they will make your life seem shiny again. And you’ll believe that you are cured. You’ll believe that you are fixed, and that life isn’t so hard anymore.

And maybe, for a time being, you’ll truly believe that they are the reason that your life turned around.

But what happens if you lose this person? What happens if you break up? What happens if they leave you? What happens when they say goodbye to you and your heart?

What happens then?

Your problems will come crashing down again. And you’ll think its because they left you. You’ll think it’s their fault you are unhappy again. But truthfully, your problems would’ve followed you even if the relationship worked out.

Your pain and hurt will always follow you. Relationships aren’t going to save you. He or she isn’t a God that will magically make your heart whole again.

The only person who can fix your heart and who can turn your life around is you.

Don’t put all your love and light into someone else. Don’t put all your energy, hope and focus on him or her. They could leave at any moment. They could vanish into thin air. They could leave in a week or in three years.

And you need to be strong enough to withstand their wreckage.

Stop finding happiness in other people. Stop giving everyone your heart, without hesitation. Stop defining your life by another human being. Truthfully, you are the only one that you need. You are the only human being that will pull yourself up from underneath this dark curtain. You are the only one who can fix yourself.

They can’t stitch up your heart like you think they can. They can’t bandage up your wounds and bullet holes that your past has shot at you. You’re the only one who can heal. And it has to be on your own.

So stop looking for relationships. Stop looking for someone to fill the void. Stop looking for another person to fix you.

You are the only person who knows your heart well enough. And you are the only one who can transform your life into a life that is worth living. Not him. Not her. Just you. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Related

More From Thought Catalog