Maybe We Were Meant To Be Temporary -- But This Still Sucks

Maybe We Were Meant To Be Temporary — But This Still Sucks

Maybe we were meant to be temporary, but that doesn’t change the fact that it hurts to lose you. That doesn’t stop me from picturing the way you laugh and smile and snore every single night when my head hits the pillow.

Knowing we weren’t meant to last doesn’t take away any of the pain. It doesn’t make my heart heal any faster.

Losing you hurts like hell. It’s hard to see a bright side or a silver lining, at least from where I’m currently standing. Maybe sometime in the future, I’ll be able to look back at this moment and be thankful. Maybe this will be the exact point where my entire world changes for the better. Maybe everyone is right when they keep telling me this is a good thing.

But right here, right now, my existence feels miserable. It’s a struggle to survive without you. Every breath brings me pain. Every heartbeat feels like a waste when you’re not here to press your ear against my chest.

Maybe we were never meant to last — but we made so much sense together. You brought me so much peace and comfort and friendship. You supported me through my darkest, most inescapable moments. You made me feel like a good person, even when I was convinced there was a monster inside me.

Whether I was feeling hopeless or angry or upset, you never flinched at my nastiest emotions. You could handle everything thrown at you — and you didn’t act like you were handling me at all. You acted like it was a privilege to be near me. And I felt the same way about you. I still, do.

Maybe we were meant to be temporary. Maybe we were meant to guide each other further in life, and then part ways so we could travel the rest of our journeys alone. Maybe every moment in our relationship meant something, but our separation means something, too. 

Just because we’re parting doesn’t mean we’re going to forget each other. It doesn’t mean we’re going to start badmouthing each other and forget how much we cared about each other. Just because our love story is over doesn’t mean it never happened. Our memories aren’t going anywhere.

However, knowing this is the right thing doesn’t make it any easier. Knowing, in the long-run, we’re going to be fine without each other doesn’t bring me any peace. Not yet. Not now.

You taught me the meaning of love, so it’s only fitting you teach me the meaning of heartbreak.

Maybe we were always meant to be temporary — but losing you still sucks. I’m not going to pretend this is easy on me. I’m not going to act like the transition from your lover to less has been easy on me. But I’m not going to kick and scream about it anymore, either. I’m not going to resist doing what’s best for you and best for me.

Maybe we were meant to be temporary — but there’s a beauty in temporary things. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

January Nelson is a writer, editor, and dreamer. She writes about astrology, games, love, relationships, and entertainment. January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University.