1. Every conversation we had was negative. She had no positive things to say.
2. I ended it after a year because she told me she went to the movies but went to a club with her girlfriends.
I dunno, if it’s so easy to lie about something small, I don’t want to stick around to find out what else she might be lying about.
3. I didn’t like a guy’s texting etiquette. He couldn’t spell basic things and used too many !!! And 🤣🤣🤣
4. His sex face. It was super angry and serious looking I couldn’t help but laugh every time and it would piss him off.
5. He would say, “Guess What! Guess What!” or “You wanna know what happened?” and then would not tell me until I said yes. If you didn’t respond he would keep repeating those phrases.
6. A few times he said stuff like, “You’re so smart… for a girl” and “Wow for a girl you know a lot about tech.”
I’m not actually that smart, but smart enough to know those little “compliments” are a red flag.
7. He always went along with my plans. “What do you want to do on the weekend?” – “You decide.” “What are we going to eat?” – “What do you feel like eating?” We went anywhere I wanted, watched the movies I was interested in, ate what I had an appetite for. It was like someone just tagging along with my everyday life. I couldn’t even tell what kind of hobbies he actually had. It got boring really fast.
8. Took her out on 5 dates and paid for them all. On the next one, I suggested splitting it down the middle. She immediately got furious, claiming she had always had her meals paid for and “that’s just what guys are supposed to do”.
9. He wore this one brown shirt I absolutely hated like once a week at least. I figured I didn’t really like him that much if I was so focused on one shirt.
10. Not seeing him more than once a month. He lived like 15 minutes away, tops, so it’s not like it’d have been hard to come over.
11. She was pissed I wasn’t sharing my year end bonus with her. She obviously snooped in my checkbook at home office.
12. He moved, and the trip to his house went from 10 minutes to 30.
I don’t do long-distance.
13. Didn’t know what an inside voice was. Acted like I was on the other end of a football field when I was 2 feet in front of her.
14. We were riding in the car and passed a walking track where a woman was walking. She was easily 400 pounds and sweating profusely as she worked her way around the track.
He looked at me and said, “Some people shouldn’t be allowed to work out in public.” He dropped me off at home and I said, “Have a nice life.”
15. She had bad breath.
16. She was super girly. Like, screaming about any bug. Not just scary bugs, but an ant or something. Lots of pink shirts and pink nails and I was just like, “is it worth it?”
17. A bad tattoo
She had a really big (and bad) Alkaline Trio tattoo on her lower back. It was clearly from another time in her life. But for some reason I just couldn’t move past it. We’d be having sex and I just couldn’t stop looking at it. To the point that I tried to stay away from doggy style so I didn’t have to see it.
Other than that I was really attracted to her. But I can still see that tattoo in my mind and it makes me cringe.
18. He told me it was him or my car, Me and my car drove away and left him at the side of the road.
19. I didn’t feel attracted to them. I liked them as a friend. I liked the idea of a relationship. They were kind. I just didn’t feel any attraction.
20. She cheated at solitaire.
21. I realize this sounds insane. I stopped talking to a guy because he had an Android. The green bubbles really annoyed me. I couldn’t do it.
22. She was mad at me because she thought I didn’t like her cat.
I liked the cat better than her, so I figured it was time to bow out.
23. She left the lid off of everything. So I’d go to the cupboard grab a ketchup bottle from the top, ends up all over me and my kitchen. It happened 7 times before I ended it.
24. She was a close talker, I can’t stand close talkers.
25. It was all going seemingly good until I applied for an apprenticeship in a male dominated industry and he couldn’t handle it. He kept saying. He was so damn jealous and paranoid over it that I knew it would only get worse so I got out straight away.
26. She wore pajamas and uggs in public. You know, the ones with “PINK” written real big on the butt. Very pretty girl and nice, but I just can’t hang with that.
27. She had this weird accent she would get randomly even though she’was from the same place as me. It became very hard not to notice after a while and it bothered me.
28. She got irritated with me that I loaned my parents money for things they needed. We were only 3 months into our relationship and that was a level of controlling that was a huge red flag.
29. She refused to wear a seatbelt and would text and drive.
Somehow she is still alive nearly 8 years later and for the love of God I don’t know how.
30. I was seeing this guy who would always say, “I forgive you” any time we slightly disagreed on something or I did something little like shut the car door too hard. I got so annoyed of being “forgiven” for things I hadn’t even apologized for.
Still irritates me and it’s supposed to be a polite thing. Irksome.
31. The idiot was a HORRIBLE driver; I mean absolutely insanely bad like I’ve never seen before. He was driving between two lanes on an LA freeway.
32. Her teeth, super great girl and we had amazing conversations, but I couldn’t imagine waking up to those teeth for the rest of my life. We had only been hanging out for a couple of weeks, not too bad, still feel kinda bad for it. Though I never told her that’s why I ended the whole thing.
33. Ending every sentence with, “so…”
To be fair, we’d only been on one date and talked on the phone a few times.
34. He just breathes too loud…. mouthbreather.
35. I was 17 and leaving for the Army. We had only been dating a couple months, and the night before I shipped out, she gave me one of those cringy morph photos of what your kids would look like based on pictures of the couple.
She wasn’t typically crazy, just really insecure and young me saw my life flash before my eyes. I sat her down and explained that it was a crazy stressful time, she was still a sophomore or junior in high school, and that I needed some space to get some life momentum and couldn’t string her along into the unknown. She cried, we hugged and kissed goodbye for about an hour, and that was that.
36. She got a dog and for some reason felt the need to narrate the dog’s every inner thought. In first-person. In a chipper dopey voice. I just can’t.
37. I noticed her hair line was slightly too far back and I couldn’t not notice it. It was too distracting.
38. She laughed like Seth Rogen and it was getting really annoying. Nothing wrong with her, just not the right one for me I guess.
39. Ending a sentence with a preposition.
40. Kept barging into my apartment without knocking like we were in a fucking sitcom.
Nice girl, pretty, smart, but a bit moody and uptight about stuff. I could forgive that part but the barging in pissed me off so much I just couldn’t do it any more.
41. So there’s this circle at my college that makes a really cool noise if you clap in the middle of it. I was with my gf at the time, maybe like a week into the relationship, and she was walking over it and I go “Oh! Have you clapped here yet?” And she just refused to clap. She was standing in the exact spot and she goes “That requires effort for me to raise my hands and clap”. Ended it the next day.
42. We watched Monty Python and the Holy Grail with some friends. She didn’t laugh and at the end asked me “Why do you think that was funny?” I didn’t explain and broke it off the next week. I get opinions vary about comedy, but if you don’t find the Holy Grail even slightly entertaining, we are not gonna be good together.
43. A friend pointed out to me that the guy I was dating looked exactly like Jared from Subway. I couldn’t un-see it.
44. We played “Are you smarter than a fifth grader?”
Vastly different scores.
I really wish I were kidding.
45. We’d been dating two weeks and she said “I think I love you”. To be fair we did get along very well and things seemed like they could go somewhere but something always bothered me about her I couldn’t put my finger on. So immediately after she said this I broke up with her on the spot and she threw a lamp at me, went instantly crazy. Trust your gut folks.
46. When I was in high school I broke up with my boyfriend when it came time to pick our bus seats for the semester. I knew he’d want to sit together. I also knew we’d probably break up during the semester, and then have to go through the drama and embarrassment of getting our seats changed. So I broke up with him before the seating charts came out to make my life easier down the road.
47. I had 4 dates with her in 4 months…. her excuse for not hanging out the weekend I finally broke it off? There was a spider in her room and she was scared to go in, and her phone was in her room. Pathetic.
48. She shout talked. All the time.
49. She would always text me whenever she was taking a shit, and also her favorite food was black beans and she would send me pictures of them all the time.
I fucking hate beans.
50. She wore a bell on her wrist. Everytime she would move it would jingle. It was like I was sleeping with a house cat.