1. Lots of girls are insecure with how they look while on top during sex. I can assure you that 90% of men are thinking 1 of 2 things in that scenario. Either some iteration of “fuck yeah this is awesome” or “don’t cum yet, don’t cum yet, don’t cum yet.”
2. Being butt naked in front of me. Too many women won’t take off all their clothes or they always want the light off, which doesn’t work for me because I am a visual creature. I had one girlfriend who got butt naked when I wasn’t looking, then she called for me and when I looked, she was bent over the couch looking back at me. Every fiber of my being exploded at that moment.
3. Your sense of humor. If you’re funny, cool. If you’re not then you don’t have to force it. And please don’t hide your weird little sense of humor. When we’re with our male friends, not everyone in our group is funny. There’s usually 1 or 2 guys who’re really funny and the rest of us just keep the momentum of the jokes going.
4. The shape of your labia. Like, it’s cool. Only the young and inexperienced are super picky. Yeah I mean some super pretty ones are nice, buuuut it doesn’t matter. When we actually get the chance to use it, it’s not gonna stop us.
5. I’m gonna go with having a wide nose. Wide noses are cute AF and they just make your septum piercings look even better. So to my ex that got a nose job cause of her current boyfriend, I’m sorry he made you feel ugly enough to alter that beautiful nose that I loved to kiss.
6. Definitely hair. So many times I’ve heard the ladies say “ugh my hair is a mess right now don’t look at me” or something along those lines. Meanwhile I’m over here like loving that messy just-outta-the-shower look.
7. Broken nail – unnoticeable, so you do not need to stress about it in company of a man.
8. A lot of women seem to have an obsession with the size of their feet. I don’t think I’ve ever looked at an attractive woman and thought, “Wow, she’s nice, but she’s clearly a size 7 and I only date women size 6 and below.”
9. Freckles! My wife is SUPER self conscience about her freckles. And I’ve known other woman to be too. I love them. Think they’re super cute and wouldn’t change a thing.
10. Pores. What is with women’s obsession with their pores?! I don’t think I’ve ever looked at a woman and been like “damn, she’d be so hot if it wasnt for those pores.”
11. Periods. I genuinely don’t care if you happen to get your period around me, it doesn’t bother me in the slightest. I’ll change the sheets and go right back to bed, you can wear one of my pants while I wash yours. Need pads/tampons? Tell me what you want and I’ll run to the store. It’s 100% natural. Any man who freaks out about periods has the mindset of a 13 year old.
12. Boob or nipple ”abnormalities.” There are no abnormalities in my eyes. I love them all. Nothing is that weird where I’m not going to be attracted to boobs.
13. “My boobs aren’t the same size!” Sweetie, i’m way too busy getting horny when looking at them to compare their size, don’t worry.
14. Panty lines in jeans/slacks. My wife makes the biggest deal out of only wearing thongs when she goes out of the house because she doesn’t want panty lines. I am here to tell you though, that never in the history of man has a man cared about panty lines.
15. Sweat. Congrats! You’re a certified human and your body needs to cool itself down. What’s the big deal?
16. Feet with some callused skin/dry skin – as long as someone doesn’t have some foot fetish, men are not interested in that whatsoever.
17. Morning breath. Bitch just kiss me god fucking damnit.
18. Cellulite! I absolutely love that shit!
19. Girls who are insecure with their thin lips and want them filled.
20. Chin fluff, mustaches and she-beards. It takes ages to even notice, an eternity to give a shit. Most of the time we’re either looking at your eyes.
21. Pooping at my place. Look I’m grown I know you take a dump at some point don’t hold it then pretend you gotta go somewhere or wait for me to leave.
22. Farting. Look, just let it rip. My wife farted first when we were dating, it was an accident and she had the most horrified look on her face. I was surprised but at the same time relieved. I can’t tell you how stress free it is not having to hold in a fart for hours upon hours.
23. Don’t care how tall/short you are. Tall girls are hot, short girls are hot, I’m not a basketball coach.
24. Outfit repeats.
25. It always upsets when women get mad that they have a fat ass, I love a fat ass. Also too I love plus size women and it’s always upsetting that it seems that some of them aren’t comfortable with who they are or feel bad because of the way they are built and yes I know about our societies beauty standards but you can’t help who you are, It’s so attractive when people are comfortable with who they I won’t apologize for finding you attractive I don’t care if you think you are or not.
26. What they eat/how they eat. Eating a salad every meal, but you really want a burger and fries, just eat the damn burger. As long as you aren’t a complete slob, most of us don’t care.
27. I was about to have sex with this gorgeous woman and she stops me and says, “Stop, I did not shaved my legs today.” And I told her “So what… I don’t give a fuck.”
28. Sneezing, you don’t need to hold it in.
29. Stretch marks. Your body changed at some point in the past. This happens. Most people have them somewhere.
30. Being emotional. A lot of girls seem to think that “being one of the guys” is the way to go. They often have emotional moments and later apologize for the “event”. Ladies you must understand that us guys repress and hide our emotions almost constantly and having to deal with your honest emotions, although taxing, are also a necessity in helping us bring some of our own shit to the surface. If we get close and comfortable with you we are going to tell you things we’ve likely never told another living soul for no other reason than because we draw from that emotional energy and can feel safe within it. You open up to us and we open up to you.
31. Thigh gaps. So your thighs touch. That just means you keep my head in better comfort when it’s in between them.
32. Tits are tits. Be they big or small, perky or not, I’m just glad to touch them.
33. Unkempt eyebrows.
34. Scars. My crush has a huge one on her stomach and I love it.
35. Caring how you look when eating something. Fucking ravish them chicken wings gurl.
36. Social media pics. I know what you look like in real life. There’s no need to go overboard.