One lady tried to pay for $400 of groceries with her sister’s maxed-out card, said “well, it’s not mine, anyway…” then when I couldn’t do anything about it, lined her kids up and said “We’re not eating this week because of this man.”
As soon as you close the drawer and the receipt prints out –
“OH wait I didn’t mean to give you that 10, I had a 5, can I just get my 10 back and give you this 5? Just open the drawer, give me that 10 bill and I’ll give you this 5. Oh nevermind I have a 20, give me two tens and a five for the 20 and we’ll be even.”
No you absolutely cannot quick change me, I’m not an idiot.
Threatening to call the police after you don’t like our return policy which requires a receipt.
I had this customer once where he would put his items on the belt one by one, look at the price, tell me the price, then say whether it’s expensive or not. THEE most annoying shit in the world, especially when there was a lot of people waiting in line….and I can see the damn price on the computer.
Set some stuff down by the register then go walk around and pick out more stuff. Get all of the shit you want BEFORE you try to pay for it.
People with a full cart of groceries saying “Can you believe I only came for milk (or bread) LOL??”
Spending 20 minutes trying to find exact change when they could easily pay with what they’re holding. Especially when they’re holding up the line. Just give me the fucking money, it takes like 5 seconds for me to give you change back.
8. Dad Jokes
Handing me a $50 or $100 bill, saying, ‘I just printed it this morning!’ HARDIE FUCKING HAR HAR. They must think they’re so clever.
People who insist on using the express lane with way more than the limit.
“Over there it said it was blah blah price.” Walk over and it’s not.
I worked in a small natural food store and people complained about the prices all the time. “YOU KNOW THEY SELL THIS DOWN THE STREET FOR $1 LESS?”
GO MY FRIEND. BE FREE.
12. Check Writers
I always hated people paying with a check and not having anything filled out while I ring every item up, and then I get to watch them fill in the date, the name of the store, ask me the total, etc. while the line backs up…
Let their kids mash on shit.
When you finish ringing them out and they remember they have a coupon. I’d have to return everything and do another transaction.
My “Checkstand is closed” sign is up, light is off, I explain my register is closed, and the customer ignores me completely and puts their shit on my belt anyways.
This happened to me once and I have hated this woman ever since. She didn’t even look at me. She just literally had her nose in the air the whole time. Like she was hot shit. Fuck you lady. I scanned your most expensive item twice. “Whoops.”
Leaving their personal coffee mug/other drinking cup in the basket for me to deal with.
Customer buys $900 TV
Customer: I would like to pay in pennies.
Me: 0.01, 0.02…
6 hours later…
Me: 374.54, 374.55…
Customer: Oh this is taking too long, I’ll just use my credit card.
Giving unwarranted business advice – “you really should….” the business has been running for 15 years. I really dont think I need to take your advice.
Licking your finger then grabbing your bills and handing them to me. Like I don’t want to fucking touch your saliva.
When people ask if they can use a coupon after it expired because they forgot… Then my managers accept it anyway. What’s the point of having an expiration date if you’re just going to override it? Like it’s your responsibility to keep track of that shit. It’s two dollars off, you’ll live.
Returning clearly worn-off tools way past 30 days and expecting a refund without receipt.
When I ring a customer up and they are a couple dollars short and act like they don’t have to pay it. ugh.
Tell me how long they’ve been coming into the store when something doesn’t go their way. Say an item doesn’t ring up on sale. “I’ve been coming here for 20 years!” Really? Because I’ve lived here my whole life, and I remember when they built this fucking place 10 years ago. Even if they had been coming for 20 years, it’s not as though that’s a magical phrase that means they just get whatever they want instantly.
Or they’ll say “Oh, the other cashier just always does it for me.” in regards to scanning a store rewards card or getting a discount (Both against policy). Well, cool. They can lose their job, but I’m not losing mine, and if the other cashier is always so helpful and gives you whatever you want why didn’t you just go to them?
24. It’s One Penny
I saw a lady at the self checkout today, start a scene because her beansprouts were 99 cents but it’s supposed to be 98 cents, like pennies don’t exist in Canada anymore. I understand principles but this is just stupid. Oh and fuckers that price match the world.
25. It’s Wal-Mart…
One customer argued with me for twenty minutes over a 60 cent coupon for an item she didn’t want, forcing me to apologize to her and everyone else in line for her shitty behavior. When a manager didn’t show up for five minutes, even though I did everything in my power to summon these beings of middle management, she cursed me out and walked away, leaving me to cancel her order.
Another man forced me to say the phrase, “I’m sorry sir, but I can’t accept this coupon because you aren’t buying the proper brand of lube.” Who gets coupons for sexual lubricant anyway? And who buys that shit at Wal-Mart.
People get mad that their filthy, crumpled-up, torn, expired coupons worth less than a flee’s fart are not accepted by our system. They look at me like I’d just strangled their children. I fucking hate whoever came up with this idea of slips of paper that give you meaningless discounts for shit you don’t need.
TL:DR Coupons are Satan’s inventions.
When women with huge purses spend like a minute repacking their bags after the transaction is finished and I’m just standing there looking back and forth between her and a line of customers staring at us.
When they approach you, and hand you seven items they’ve decided they don’t want. I work in a home decor store, so item sizes range a lot.