Holly Riordan

It sucks when people assume you’re too strong and independent to get hurt by a casual hookup — or when they simply don’t care whether you get hurt. 

It’s entirely possible to achieve success in your career and success in your relationship. You don’t have to choose one over the other — at least, not when you’re with the right person. 

You have to continue putting in the effort, even when it feels like it’s getting you nowhere.

Don’t hold yourself back because you feel like you’re already behind, like you already lost your chance at happiness, like there’s no hope for you.

You can’t lower your standards, just because you’re a little lonely.

Their relationship isn’t based entirely on sex — or even romance.

You might not have gone on any official dates — but that doesn’t mean your flirting wasn’t real. It doesn’t mean your feelings weren’t real. It doesn’t mean your friendship wasn’t real. 

Relationships require effort — but you shouldn’t be the only one putting in the effort.

They aren’t going to play any games. They aren’t going to make you guess what’s on their mind. They’re going to be vocal about their feelings for you.

CANCER: Don’t push good people away, just because you have been hurt in the past. Don’t assume everyone who enters your world is going to bring as much harm to you as the last people who have left. Don’t let your history turn you into a cynic. Don’t let your heart turn to ice. 

You don’t want to deal with unanswered texts and canceled plans and unmet expectations.

You need to believe in yourself because the second you start doubting yourself is the second you leave yourself vulnerable to quitting. 

Having a history with someone doesn’t mean you’re required to have a future with them.

Your failures are proof you cared about something enough to try even though there was a chance you could fail.

When you love someone, you show respect for them, even when they aren’t in the room.

Your relationship isn’t supposed to make you sick to your stomach. It’s not supposed to make you feel like the world is crashing down around you. It’s not supposed to make you feel like you’re broken.

You can’t have a conversation without bringing up sex. You can’t hang out without making out. You never have any deep, meaningful conversations. You never spend any quality, non-sexual time together. It’s all about your attraction.

He keeps coming up with more and more reasons to avoid making your relationship official. Maybe he really isn’t ready for a relationship right now because his heart is broken and he’s trying to heal. Or maybe he doesn’t want to make you his official girlfriend in case his ex wants to get back together again. Maybe he’s trying to stay available for her.