If your girlfriend is feeling unappreciated, what she wants from you isn’t that complicated. You don’t have to pay attention to her every second of the day. You don’t have to answer her texts within minutes and shower her with compliments whenever you see her. You don’t have to do much, aside from treat her right.
Your girlfriend wants you to act fully present when she’s in the room. She doesn’t want you to stare at your phone, texting other people, while she’s sitting across the dinner table from you. Especially when she only gets to see you for a few hours each week. She understands that she is never going to be the center of your universe, but she wants to be the center of your attention — at least while you’re on dates.
Your girlfriend wants your support. She wants your encouragement. She wants your praise. When she’s having a rough time at work or with her family, she doesn’t want you to try to solve her problems for her. She wants you to give her a pep talk about how you know she can figure it out, you know she can handle it, you know she has what it takes to succeed.
Your girlfriend wants reassurance you’re interested in her mind as much as her body. As much as she adores compliments about the way she looks, she also wants to hear about how hard you make her laugh and how your conversations with her are the highlight of your day. She wants to know that you aren’t with her for the wrong reasons.
Your girlfriend wants you to treat her feelings like they’re valid. She doesn’t want to open up to you about her most intimate thoughts, only to have you say she’s overreacting. She doesn’t want you to act like her problems aren’t real problems. She doesn’t want you to make her feel stupid. When something is bothering her, it should bother you.
Your girlfriend wants you to pay attention when she’s speaking to you. She doesn’t want to repeat herself three times. She doesn’t want you to interrupt her stories with your own. She doesn’t want you to lose focus on what she’s saying halfway through the conversation. She wants you to be engaged. And she wants you to contribute to the conversation instead of simply mhming along to whatever she is saying.
Your girlfriend wants you to respect her. She doesn’t want you to flirt with any other women, whether or not she happens to be in the room. She doesn’t want you to talk badly about her behind her back or online where the world can see. She doesn’t want you to act like a dick.
Your girlfriend wants you to show interest in the things that matter the most to her. She doesn’t need you to learn everything there is to know about her hobbies. She doesn’t even need you to like her hobbies. But if something matters to her, it should matter to you. At least a little.
Your girlfriend deserves to feel appreciated. She deserves to feel loved. She deserves to know how much you care.