When you end a relationship on bad terms, it sucks because you not only lose a partner but you lose a friend. After such a nasty breakup, things change. You aren’t able to text them when you see something that reminds you of them. You aren’t able to wish them a happy birthday. You aren’t even able to keep track of their life on social media because you’ve blocked each other. You’ve completely cut each other out of your lives.
When you end a relationship on bad terms, you go from lovers to strangers in a heartbeat. If you saw each other in public, you aren’t even sure whether they would acknowledge you, whether they would curse you out, or whether they would walk the other way. All you know is things are never going to go back to the way they were. You’re never going to call yourself friends again.
When you end a relationship on bad terms, it feels like it should be easier to get over them. After all, you have a million reasons to be mad at them. They said so many nasty things. They made it perfectly clear they aren’t the right person for you, because the right person would never treat you the way they have treated you. But getting over them isn’t as easy as you would think because it’s hard to let go of your intense, fiery emotions. It’s hard to calm down and stop obsessing over them.
When you end a relationship on bad terms, it complicates other areas of your world. If you shared the same friend group, everyone has to pick a side. It’s impossible for the two of you to exist in the same room together, which means one of you is going to stop getting invited to parties, one of you is going to lose friends as well as a relationship. And that sucks for everyone involved.
When you end a relationship on bad terms, you have to accept you’re never going to get any closure. Since there’s no chance of you two sitting down and having a mature, level-headed, adult conversation, that means you have to learn to live with what happened. You have to leave all of your questions unanswered.
When you end a relationship on bad terms, some people are going to believe you’re the bad guy. They’re going to hear your ex’s point of view and they’re going to trust that every word is true. They aren’t going to give you a chance to explain yourself. They’re simply going to assume you were the reason for the breakup. And you can’t let them get to you. You can’t care what they think.
When you end a relationship on bad terms, it’s going to feel like you’re going through hell. Instead of being able to wish the other person well, you’re going to be filled with so much anger and resentment and regret. You aren’t going to be able to look back at your love story and appreciate the good times without being reminded of the bad times. The pain is too fresh. It hurts too much to think about.