Sometimes, You Shouldn’t Send The First Text

Sometimes, You Shouldn’t Send The First Text

Sometimes, you should not bear your soul. Sometimes, you should not put your heart on the line. Sometimes, the risk is not worth it.

Leaving your comfort zone is an important step toward finding the right relationship — but not every person is worthy of your energy.

You have to be careful with how much you offer another person or they might take advantage of you.

If you have been missing someone, stop for a second. Before you send the first text, ask yourself how many times you have had to send the first text in the past. Ask yourself what percentage of effort you have placed into the relationship from day one versus the amount they have given in return.

You should not be an afterthought. You should not be forgettable in their eyes. You should not have to force your name onto their phone for them to remember your existence.

If they are always too busy and preoccupied to send the first text, then you should stop giving them so much of your attention. You should not be the one doing all the work. You should be splitting the work down the middle.

If you are the only one who starts conversations, the only one who plans outings, the only one who seems to care about strengthening your relationship, then you need to let go. You should not accept one-sided love. You should hold out for an equal.

Even though you have been dying to talk to them, even though you really don’t mind sending the first text time and time again, sometimes you should ignore the temptation. Sometimes, you should put down your phone. Sometimes, you should give the other person space and see what happens.

If your relationship completely disintegrates after you stop putting in as much effort, then you know you are not high on their list of priorities. You know you were the one who cared more. You know the only reason you stayed in each others lives for so long was because of you alone.

You should not settle for someone who loses track of how long it’s been since the last time you’ve spoken. Someone who is comfortable going days — maybe even weeks — without hearing from you. Someone who answers your texts when they are bored but never takes the time to reach out to you on their own.

You deserve someone who starts to miss you after going a few hours without talking to you. Someone who sends the first text early in the morning so they can spend the entire day in conversation with you. Someone who would never be able to last more than a day or two without talking to you again.

Sometimes, you should not send the first text, even if you are eager to talk to them again. Sometimes, you should take their silence as a hint to delete their number. Sometimes, you should stay single until you find someone who makes your phone light up as much as your eyes. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Holly is the author of Severe(d): A Creepy Poetry Collection.

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